Ok, so here it goes. All but one thing I am going to mention has gone undiagnosed and it's driving me crazy. I am unable to work any more because of lower and middle back pain.
The lumbar region pain started back when I was around 17, I am now 40. It was bad enough when it started but doctors only gave me narcotic pain killers. I could not function while taking them so I learned to "deal" with the pain over time. It spans my lower back, sometimes left, most times right, and sometimes both sides. I used to get the "firey" pain down the back of my right leg. That doesn't happen so much any more. At times I feel, for a lack of better words, an outward pushing pressure centered around my lower spine like a balloon being inflated. Other times it is just intense pain. I have fallen to the floor on many occasions due to the intensity of the pain. There isn't a particular trigger. I can be sitting, standing, laying down. Any position and even slight movements can make the pain flare. In the last couple years there are times, when I'm not thinking I'll bend at the waist and shortly afterwards, within a minute typically, I begin to lose all feeling in my legs at which point I need to sit or I'll fall down. I've had imaging done on a couple occasions and have been told everything seems to be normal. At a pain management clinic I was given 2 corticosteroid injections in different locations, one month between, and both had the adverse effect of making the pain worse, I turned down a third injection. At this point, the clinician performed a nerve conduction test from my right lumbar down my right leg. This is the only time I have heard that there is an abnormality. He didn't explain it further than that. I now have a TENS unit, and it helps, but only while I have it running. The pain returns shortly after a session.
Second problem. In the center of my back, just below my ribs, I get sudden bouts of sharp pain that also causes pain in my chest. The aforementioned pain management clinician said that he believed I had a rib out of place in addition to whatever is causing the originating pain.
Third. I get random muscle spasms in various areas of my body. These can last for several minutes up to a day or more. The most annoying is my right ear. The only way I can describe the sound that is made is that it's as if a moth is fluttering in my inner ear. If I turn my head to stress the muscles on the right side it will sometimes stop, but only if I keep my head in that position. Other times, if I put a finger into my ear canal and pull downwards it helps. I also gets small grouping spasms elsewhere such as my right shoulder, thighs, the arch of my left foot, biceps, index fingers and eyelids (they don't blink, more like horizontal twitching of the lids). There's more but I can't think of specific locations. It's usually, and I can't think how to describe it better, a small patch such as a 1/2 - 1 inch wide by 2 - 3 inch long area. Some mornings, when I awake suddenly, I'll blink my eyes and my jaw snaps shut. That usually passes quickly though. I have been on SSRI medications for a long time now and had to change medications to an NaSSA (Mirtazapine) because of complications. While on any SSRI now, when I lay down, I experience severe muscle spasms. My leg will kick out violently, my arms will jerk forward, my back will arch or my head will snap backwards. I was prescribed Gabapentin, but could not continue its' use because I became irritable to the point of severe, uncontrollable anger.
Fourth. Both long and short term memory problems. It's more like the memories just aren't there than fading memories.
Fifth. This is the one thing that has actually been diagnosed. Osgood Schlatter's disease. My left tibial tuberosity looks like a jigsaw puzzle in the x-rays. Also, the kneecap is tilted and has a hook. They have yet to do imaging on the right. I'm told I'll need surgery to correct the problem.
I'm sure this is due to the vasectomy I had about 10 years ago but I sometimes, for no apparent reason, feel like I've been kicked in the groin. The pain is centered on my right testicle which has been tender to the touch for a few years now. This pain also triggers severe chest pain, at times to the point that I feel as though I am going to vomit.
If anyone has any advice, I'd greatly appreciate it. Like I said in the title, I have no idea if any of these symptoms are related in any way.