Women's Health: Postpartum Community
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Avatar universal

I feel so bad

I am 16.5 weeks pregnant and I am just so sick all of the time. The doctor has tried everything and there's just nothing I can do but just live with it.  the problem is I can't work and i absolutely have to. my power bill is late my phone has been disconnected. my father passed away in july and he left me his house the only problem is it's not paid off and i am 2 months behind. the baby's father is not offering to help at all.  does anyone know if there's some type of assistance i can get?
6 Responses
Avatar universal
Well..........I guess the first thing you should do is ask your doctor why he can't give you something to help with the morning sickness. Explain to him that you "HAVE" to work and that you are having trouble doing it because you are sick all the time.

Other than that.......I'm sure you qualify for WIC. That helps out a little and will really help out later if you use formula.

I'm sure there are other assistance programs in your state. I'm sorry I'm not sure where to tell you to call to get the information but I'm sure some others will........
I want to say to call social services but I'm not sure if that is it or not. Your local health department would be able to tell you where to call.

After the baby is born you can take your babys father to court and make him pay child support........I don't know that he has to pay anything until then........sorry.

Good Luck to you.
Avatar universal
Just a suggestion but if your doctor takes you off of work you might beable to get temporary disability checks from work and contact your social security office and you might beable to get temperary disability from them as well.

Good luck and hope you feel better soon.
Avatar universal
In some states you would be able to take him to court now and get him to pay at least half of your medical expenses. But if he contested it, then it might be put off until the baby is born and paternity is proven. THEN he would owe you for the past nine months and for the time it took to get the test results.

To get the ball rolling, the first thing you need to do is call your locla health department. They will either have the medicaid office in the same building OR can put you in touch with the local medicaid office. When you apply for medicaid, if you qualify, they go ahead and start providing medicaid for you, THEN THEY go after your baby's father. Then it becomes a matter of him having to tell the state why he can't/won't provide. Then if the state determines he CAN afford to provide for you, then the state sues him for what they have spent on you in medical bills. They even help get you child support. In most cases, even if they are successful in getting child support, you still qualify for medicaid benefits.

You should also get WIC, which if you qualify for medicaid, you qualify for WIC. It will really help with food for you for now and food and formula once baby is born.

As for the sick thing, you should really impress on your Dr how important it is for you to work and how awful you have been feeling. Don't apologize like we women tend to. "I'm sorry doc, but I really do feel sick!" Just say it flat out, "I feel too bad to work, not working is not an option, I NEED something!!!"
Avatar universal
I know how awful it is to not be able to pay your bills--(((Hugs))) to you on that issue.  

Calling to check into Medicaid is a great idea--most times pregnant women who have lower incomes automatically qualify, and many times your child qualifies after he/she is born until a certain age.  Kassimom is right too about WIC.  

However, I don't think you will be successful in getting the baby's father to pay anything yet, nor will he owe back child support when the baby is born (if I read that correctly).  Child support can't legally start until there is a child born.  Not fair, but I believe that is the way it is.  It would be nice if he would help, and maybe you could convince him that you would feel much better about him in regards to future child support if he would help now.  

Call the mortgage co and ask if they have a plan that would allow you to "catch up" payments.  We had to do that once, paying extra for 3 more months until the delinquent amount was made up.  If you are late with any more payments, the house may go into foreclosure.  They will look more kindly on you if you at least call to tell them you are pregnant and having trouble.  (Not to say they will be TOO nice, but at least you go on record saying you tried)!
Are there ANY relative who can help?  Some employers have a fund also for employees in dire need of financial help--they will loan you a small (usually $1000-2000)amount for critical bills.

Look into Chap7 bankruptcy.  Almost all lawyers have free consultations, and if this is appropriate for you, all collection attempts will stop immediately once you file.  You can often keep your house, car, and belongings.  It's not as hard as you think--and you might feel much better.  But it's not for everyone in every situation.  The first visit is free--what do you have to lose?


Morning sickness help

-Go to CVS and ask for something called SEABANDS.  They are just wrist bands with a small accupressure round thing attached that some pregnant women swear by.
-Preggie Pops.  Don't know about 'em, but I've heard 'em mentioned here.
-What meds have you tried?

General Remedies:
Avoid warm places as heat can increase the nausea feelings.
Take naps during the day (but not right after eating). Tiredness plays a big part in morning sickness.
Get enough sleep at night.
Get out of bed slowly in the morning.
Try eating plain crackers or dry cereal before you get out of bed in the morning.

Open windows or turn on exhaust fans when cooking and after meals.
Cooking in the microwave usually produces less odors.
Silly as it sounds, carry a handkerchief with a few drops of a non nausea causing essential oil (lemon for example) in it and breath through it if you can't get away from the smell that is bothering you.

Food and Drink:
Avoid greasy or spicy foods as they often cause nausea or heartburn.
Eat what you want when you want it. Your cravings will not lead you the wrong way.
Have frequent protein snacks. (Low fat meats and seafood, nuts, eggs and beans are high protein.)
Eat smaller meals every two hours or so.
Eating something salty before a meal can help you "make it through" a meal.
Do not drink fluids with your meals.
Non caffeinated teas like peppermint and ginger can help came nausea.
Drink small amounts of fluids regularly though out the day to avoid dehydration.
Do not skip meals if you can help it.
Avoid spicy and fried food - both eating and smelling it can increase your nausea.
Cold food may have less nausea inducing smells associated with them.

Try taking your prenatals later in the day.
Talk to your doctor about:
Vitamin B6 - 50 mg. daily. Vitamin B6 has been shown to help with pregnancy induced nausea. In the evening you can combine it with a Unisom(an over the counter sleep aid) if needed for much better nausea relief. Unisom+B-6 used to be a prescription combination that helped millions of women.  Years ago, they felt it might be related to an uncommon birth defect, but studies have since negated this.  Many doctors recommend this combination.  It was a miracle for me, personally years ago.
Ginger capsules: 250 mg. three times daily. Ginger has long been associated with alleviating nausea. (Remember drinking ginger ale when you felt sick when you were little?)
Ask your doctor if you can stop taking your Prenatals temporarily to see if the nausea diminishes. You may still need to take a Folic Acid supplement to help protect your baby.
Talk to your doctor about not taking iron supplements unless you are anemic. Iron supplements can be hard for your stomach to deal with.

Good luck to you.
Avatar universal
i just want to add that a lot of utility departments (electric) have programs to help you cover the cost of your electric.
they are intended for people that are very sick and can't work and for elderly on little to no income...you might check into that as well.
Avatar universal
the Unisom and b6 works wonders!!!!!!!! I take 25 mg of b6 and half of a Unisom 1 time a day. Call your doc and ask about It Danielle
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