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Women's Health: Postpartum Community
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Avatar universal

advise on friends 9 year old boys silly behaviour

My friend says shes at the end of her teather with her 9+ half old boy.she constantly gets pulled up by the teachers for things like being class clown over excited talking alot etc. This year though its been for silly things like actindently falling catching his mouth on someone when falling, yesterday clearing the running track with stones, but didnt look where he threw it and wouldnt you know it hit someone on head. the school takes a hard line on this as of course they should as it could have been so much worse.his teacher says hes not naughty, just doesnt seem to be there? her youngest child died last year and since she has not been the same. she is there for her kids as much as she can be but is struging on handling him. this behaviour is not new from him he has more aless always been the same. what you see is what you get. he can be so sensible at other times, mature loving and a very plesent boy to be around.
just seems to have problems in school, how can she deal with him?
she sent him to his room(and said he can stay there all weekend)for throwing the stone as it was very silly and could have been much worse. i dont know what to advise.Any advise would be good.
6 Responses
159063 tn?1247276417
boys will  be boys, my nine year old nephew peed in a squirt gun and was squirting the girls in the neighborhood with it. gross yes it is, but he is all boy.,I guess the only thing you can do, is keep trying to explain right from wrong. hopefully he will get it eventually.
Avatar universal
I have a step-daughter who is 9 1/2.  Granted she is a girl, we still have issues with her.  I am not a big fan of medicating kids at all, but in our case, it has proven to be such a blessing.  My DSD doesn't have ADHD, just ADD.  We tried avoiding putting her on meds for well over a year now.  We just started a LOW dose this week.  It has already made a tremendous difference in her behavior at school.  The teacher is amazed!!!  We made sure to not put her on a product that would make her like a zombie.  She has such a sweet spirit and the last thing we wanted to do is take that away from her.  She just needed a lot of help focussing on tasks and controlling her impulsivity.  She is also a highly disorganized child and I don't mean like most children are.  She is a complete wreck and has trouble remembering any tasks you give her.  I know this may be different than your situation, but dealing with a child that has behavioral issues linked to mental incapacitations can be difficult.  They don't "mean" to be this way.  And as a parent, you know when a kid is just being a kid and when there are real issues.  If you are unsure, then I would seek a professional's opinion.  If your friends don't like what they have to say, then it is only that - a professional opinion.  But if they find a good doctor, they will not medicate this little boy for the sake of medicating.  If you are ok with suggesting a therapist to your friend, then I definitely would do so.  It has certainly been a life-saver in our case.  Good luck to your friend!  I will say a prayer that they will find the answers to help get things under control.
145997 tn?1196795421
LOL!!   Oh my goodness....thats the funniest thing Ive ever heard.  Gross, but too funny.   I guess those are the things you laugh about later in life right?  That will be a good story to share at his wedding!
164559 tn?1233711618
It sounds like this little boy is pretty typical.  I have five brothers and there was very little sitting still with any of them.  He is probably reacting to the stress of losing a sibling.  He should be evaluated for add and adhd.  However, he may just be a naughty, high energy little boy.

His mum was right to punish him for throwing the rock.  Is he okay socially, does he have friends?
Avatar universal
I also meant to add that especially since this little boy is dealing with the loss of his sibling and how that is going to affect him, they definitely should consider at least getting someone for him to talk to.  It is probably a tad to young for puberty, but if he is about to go through that, I would think that is a contributing factor to his behavior.  It might be none of those things...he might just be trying to get attention from a mom who is still grieving and trying to deal with her loss and still be a mom.  That's a tough situation.  I don't know, I am not a doctor for sure, but sounds like there are some issues that are the cause of this weird behavior.  Again, kids are tough!  Good luck!
Avatar universal
She has spoke about seeking advise, she hasnt been to see anyone for herself, she has sort of withdrawn herself or trys to deal with her loss in her own way. i am there for her and we talk alot about her/out loss. its so hard.
she doent leave her kids to it she always deals with them good or naughty and talks with them allthe time or when they want about there dead brother. she doesnt think the loss has much to to do with his messing?
he is a very social boy, he has lots of friends and makes news ones really easy, but its always by showing off type of thing, trying to make them laugh, carries it on even when it gets beyond silly with adults but not with kids. hes all so very organised, she doesnt have to remind him to take pe kit in or football kit or home work anything like that, he packs his own pack and makes sure ecerything is there.
he is such a loving boy, he just get carried away with certain things? i forgot to say, his mum said he rushes his home work and doesnt take care of thing s like spellings etc even though hes an excepional speller (not like me lol)
I always tell her i really dont think its as bad as she thinks? boys will be boys. i have other friends where there boys are a night mare, now they should be worried. they never seem to caught doing any thing, her boy always owns up. like the stone thing, he went over and said sorry for cathching the stone on her head. no one would have even known who it was if he didnt own up. thats how alot of my over friends kids get away with it.lol
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