Aa
A
A
A
Close
Women's Health: Postpartum Community
26.1k Members
172826 tn?1423426556

bad news

i know this is just kind of random but im still in a little bit of a shock...i was speaking with my mom last night...my grandma passed away june 23rd from a failed open heart surgery...too much damage had been done which the docs were unable to fix concerning her right artery...the operation was a success and unfortunately because of how my grandma  was, she never wanted t worry anyone..the docs did not tell us about the failing right artery and the 10-15% chance of survival...they just told  us about the left one being the operation was 90-95% chance..never did we expect to lose her...now we know why they kept bumping her from the list because they knew with wat they were dealing with the chances were very small esp with her obesity...so the next day after the operation everything began going wrong n thats when our world started crashing down...

with that be8ng said for the first time in 8 yrs my mom decided to apply for a new doc etc...blood work was done..she is 45 goingon 46, smokes about a pack a day...5'5 and about 150, results came back and her cholesterol is at an all time high,.he has been put on a diet and placed on meds..within a month if it does not improve, her meds will be upped...the doc also told her just how serious her case is...she could either have a stroke really soon and be paralysed or within 5 yrs or less have a massive heart attack..im still trying to register this...she has been told to quit smoking,  given a list of what there is absolutely no way she shoudl be eating these foods, and i mean my mom doesnt eat bad..he must begin low fat everythings...my dad didnt get checked but my mom said due to all the **** he eats, she wouldnt be surprised if he doesnt have high colesterol...but he is so hard headed he wouldnt get checked because he is scared they will find cancer in him since his parents passed away from it and his sister and out of all the 9 kids, 6 of them have had cancer but got it in time, except for my aunt...and 3 never got checked...they would rather not know...

i never thought this day would ever come where i would have to worry about the well being of my parents when they arent so old either..like i said mymom is 45 and my dad he is 44...mymoms mom was 63 when she passed away...my dads parents were in their late 40's and early 50's...

so im still trying to register alot here...im not exactly sure how but i fear that day might be too close...that terrifies me...i want to make a change in our eating lifestyle as well...cut out some food too and substitute some things...margarine for butter with no salf and low fat and vegetable/canola oil fo extra virgin olive oil..little things like that this early...

i  suppose this is kind of a vent as well but i have mixed feelings and i dont know wat to think...thanks for listening...
4 Responses
171768 tn?1324233699
my dh and i discussed recently that we are in no position to be able to care for our parents if anything happened to them. it's very scary. his parents are in worse health than mine. i hold dd over their heads- "don't you want to be healthy so that baby Sara can have her grandparents???"
your parents need to go at it together. otherwise neither one will be successful. get them a healthy cookbook. when you visit, bring sugar-free treats. when you visit them have the whole family go for a walk with the baby (although i know it's hard since you have said how snowy it is there). given your family history, i'm glad to hear you are going to make those small changes to your lifestyle too.

unfortunately, what you describe is something that our entire generation is going to have to start facing soon. with cancer rates as higher as they are, and with obesity rates higher than ever, our parent's generation is not the healthiest.
Avatar universal
I am so sorry you are going through this.  I have a young mother too.  SHe is only 52 (I'm 34).  She lives in an assisted living facility because she didnt take care of her diabetes, etc  She has COPD, Congestive Heart Failure and lost 2 of her legs below the knee.  I can't take care of her because she needs 24 hour care.  It's very hard to go through this.  If you need anyone to talk to, please feel free to sent me a message!!!!!
310236 tn?1271297041
I am so sorry to hear what is happening with your family. I have had some similar problems. My father passed away at 51 from a routine surgery about 7 years ago and 3 years ago while planning my wedding my mother was diagnosed with 4th stage breast cancer. Thankfully the medicine she is on has been working and she is back to work full time but every time she has a checkup it is scary because her cancer is in the worst stage. My husband and I live with her to help out with bills and around the house but we almost lost our house recently because of forecloser. I am so thankful for what I have and for the baby on the way I know it has giving my mother a reason to keep on fighting. I hope everything works out for your family. If all this has taught me anything it is to never give up hope and treasure what you have.
172826 tn?1423426556
thank you so much ladies..it is scary to think about things like that, however very nice to know some have or are going through similar things i mean being only 21, going on 22 to think about the possibilities of losing either or both my parents by the time i am 3o is crucial...my dad lost his mm when he was 13 and his dad when he was 16...i talked to my mom about it..to try and cut down on smoking...she said i shou;d go more often since they dont smoke in the house with the baby...another thing i didnt mention is my mom is going through this and in the past 2 years my dad has turned into an alcoholic....losing his sister to cancer has done a tole on him as well as the rough childhood...i cant imagine...he has admitted hes not happy, he knows he has a problem and needs help but doesnt want it...ive even told him id find him the help, id go with him...etc...but he thinks because  can do counselling sessions i can help him...im not in addictions...i work with kids and teens....instead of pursuing my education in child psychology maybe i should? lol

i was giving alot of cooking hints to my mom that i do and she had never though about....so we will see...

thanks alot though...
Popular Resources
From skin changes to weight loss to unusual bleeding, here are 15 cancer warning signs that women tend to ignore.
Here’s what you need to know about the transition into menopause – and life after the change takes place.
It’s more than just the “baby blues.“ Learn to recognize the signs of postpartum depression – and how to treat it.
Forget the fountain of youth – try flossing instead! Here are 11 surprising ways to live longer.
From STD tests to mammograms, find out which screening tests you need - and when to get them.
Find out if PRP therapy right for you.