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I do not feel pleasure during sex
I’m 17 and have been sexually active since I was 15, I have never felt pleasure when being fingered or having sex. I’ve tried a lot of things but nothing works. I’ve tried almost every position too and this doesn’t help.
Are you referring to being fingered strictly by others, or yourself, too? Do you feel sexual desire? Attraction to others?
When you say no pleasure - do you mean you haven't had an orgasm, or do you mean you don't like it, or it's painful, or it's just kinda blah?
For me, at first, I wondered why people wanted to keep having sex. No offense to teen boys, but they aren't nearly as good at it as they think they are (and I'm sure it's the same for teen girls), and it takes time to learn.
Some women don't get that much pleasure from being fingered, or maybe it's the way that you're being fingered. Have you tried clitoral stimulation? Some women really prefer that over fingering.
There's no right or wrong answer here. You'll learn what you like and don't like, but don't expect it all to be like romantic sex scenes or porn (which is all fake). If your partner isn't doing what you like, or is doing something you don't like, communicate that nicely. (Communication makes sex so much better.)
So why aren't you enjoying it, and if you aren't enjoying it, why are you still having it?
When you say no pleasure - do you mean you haven't had an orgasm, or do you mean you don't like it, or it's painful, or it's just kinda blah?
For me, at first, I wondered why people wanted to keep having sex. No offense to teen boys, but they aren't nearly as good at it as they think they are (and I'm sure it's the same for teen girls), and it takes time to learn.
Some women don't get that much pleasure from being fingered, or maybe it's the way that you're being fingered. Have you tried clitoral stimulation? Some women really prefer that over fingering.
There's no right or wrong answer here. You'll learn what you like and don't like, but don't expect it all to be like romantic sex scenes or porn (which is all fake). If your partner isn't doing what you like, or is doing something you don't like, communicate that nicely. (Communication makes sex so much better.)
So why aren't you enjoying it, and if you aren't enjoying it, why are you still having it?
2 Comments
I don’t feel pleasure if i finger myself ir get fingered but clitoral stimulation is perfectly fine. If there’s a lot of foreplay and it hits the right spot when having sex then it feels good but i don’t orgasm but fingering feels like nothing at all except something just being there. I’ve been attracted to my parter for over a year but no one else at all really
Not a thing wrong with that. Some women don't orgasm from just the act of sex or fingering, and the penetration part is more about the closeness and intimacy, more than the orgasm. It may help if you or your partner stimulate your clitoris during penetration.
I asked about attraction to see if maybe you were asexual, or on that spectrum, but it doesn't seem like it?
Foreplay is a great thing, and it's awesome that you are doing that, but touching can happen while you're being penetrated. Just be open to trying, communicate, and be gentle with yourself because there isn't anything wrong with you.
I found this - "About 75 percent of all women never reach orgasm from intercourse alone -- that is without the extra help of sex toys, hands or tongue." That's from 2009.
https://abcnews.go.com/Health/ReproductiveHealth/sex-study-female-orgasm-eludes-majority-women/story?id=8485289
From 2017 - "A study published last month in The Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy found that nearly 37 percent of American women required clitoral stimulation to experience orgasm, compared with 18 percent of women who said that vaginal penetration alone was enough to come." - https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/neepb8/the-science-of-female-pleasure-still-needs-more-attention
Another article on that same 2017 study - https://metro.co.uk/2017/09/21/almost-80-of-women-dont-orgasm-from-penetrative-sex-6945941/
Hope this helps!
I asked about attraction to see if maybe you were asexual, or on that spectrum, but it doesn't seem like it?
Foreplay is a great thing, and it's awesome that you are doing that, but touching can happen while you're being penetrated. Just be open to trying, communicate, and be gentle with yourself because there isn't anything wrong with you.
I found this - "About 75 percent of all women never reach orgasm from intercourse alone -- that is without the extra help of sex toys, hands or tongue." That's from 2009.
https://abcnews.go.com/Health/ReproductiveHealth/sex-study-female-orgasm-eludes-majority-women/story?id=8485289
From 2017 - "A study published last month in The Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy found that nearly 37 percent of American women required clitoral stimulation to experience orgasm, compared with 18 percent of women who said that vaginal penetration alone was enough to come." - https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/neepb8/the-science-of-female-pleasure-still-needs-more-attention
Another article on that same 2017 study - https://metro.co.uk/2017/09/21/almost-80-of-women-dont-orgasm-from-penetrative-sex-6945941/
Hope this helps!
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