Ugh, sorry to hear. You want a good reunion with your husband, I'm sure. I'm not sure what happened here if perhaps you weren't lubricated enough or relaxed enough. Try some artificial lubricant next time. And that would also make sense for the swollen situation you describe. Friction can do that. Was it just that one time you had this situation? Have you tried again?
Wow, I'm glad you went to the doctor!! I would not have guessed UTI and the cyst. This has been ongoing since November?
If things temporarily improved when you were on an antibiotic, it is possible that the doc should just have prescribed another round of antibiotic, and continued the treatment. Some bacteria can be pretty stubborn but will go away if the length of treatment is increased -- I had that with a skin infection last year (a cellulitis). It got somewhat better but wasn't gone, and the doc took a look and just gave me the same prescription again and it finally went away on that second ten-day run. Some bacterias can be super nasty.