I’m 22 years old and I’m pretty sure I have a microperforate hymen. Ive always had a problem with trying to insert tampons, never been very successful. I get so far and then it begins to hurt badly. I’ve also examined myself and cannot see any hole at all, my hymen covers all of my entrance. Yet I know there is a hole since I have seen where my period comes out of and it is a tiny, tiny hole! I would not consider myself squeamish about this but I am worried because I want to be able to wear tampons and eventually be sexually active but this is causing a lot of problems.
My main problem at the moment is getting a doctor to listen to me. I have been to a private gynaecologist and from the start I could tell she wasn’t listening to my concerns. I told her that it was painful to insert anything and ignored this and she proceeded to use a speculum and other tools to examine me but was obviously unsuccessful. This doctor did not even look whilst trying to insert. The only thing she was able to insert when everything else didn’t was a q-tip which did not hurt at all.
However, the whole examination was extremely painful for me and she did not even stop when I was in distress! it wasn’t handled with sensitivity at all. She then proceeded to tell me I have vaginismus and that I would be referred to physiotherapist. I fail to see how any doctor can pass this off as vaginismus when she hadn’t even listened to my concerns or even visually examined me to see my hymen after unsuccessful insertion. Surely visual examination would be next after unsuccessful physical examination? I was also in a lot of discomfort for a week after this examination, like my skin had been bruised or torn. I feel like it has been such a waste of money!
I later found out many bad reviews from this particular practice and some of the dismissive nature of this particular doctor too. Now I want to get a second opinion from a more reputable doctor with good reviews and want to make sure I get listened to. Ideally I would like to get a hymenectomy in order to make this easier for myself, however I am also open to the idea that it could be vaginismus, as it is apparently more common than a hymen problem. But I am very sure my hymen is causing this problem, i know what I can see when I self examine and it matches a lot of the images online. I could be one of the small percentage of girls with this problem and I want to make sure the doctor listens to me, I don’t want to be fobbed off with something that I feel isn’t the case with me. I have done a lot of research online and so many girls have had successful hymenectomy’s that their doctors have recommended, and I would like to go through the same process but I am worried my next doctor won’t listen either. I am finding this process very frustrating.
Has anyone any advice, and was I treated as poorly as I thought? I have a lot of respect for medical professionals but this appointment just didn’t seem right and I feel my instincts should be listened to. Also how do I get across my concerns and actually get listened to, would it be out of the question for me to suggest to the doctor for me to get a hymenectomy? If i do not get this hymen removed and go ahead with physio therapy surely my hymen still there is going to cause a cycle of pain which would eventually lead to vaginismus anyway? I would appreciate some advice, thank you!