I just want to let you know this is me also, my mum died years ago and i find it very hard to try and build any relationships, the only people i have in my life is my kids. The thought of making friends make me ill, I've had terrible anxiety and bi-polar issues for years (since I was a teenager-i'm 33 now) and like you i am in control of the panic attacks at the moment but the general anxiety is still there, i just want you to know that taking it slowly is the key, i try small tasks and the older i've got i realised that i'm happier this way and accept the way I am now, prozac also help in the long term not short i went down the drugs line and got addicted to several kinds in the pursuit to rid me of my panic attacks and anxiety but to be honest it made things a million times worse and ruined 10yrs of my life, (then you have to fix the mess you made!) so if your boyfriend helps you thats great but don't depend on him to much as if anything happens it can be devasting as you ned to learn to do things all over again, like i said start with small tasks and don't be to hard on yourself! I really wanted to tell you your not alone!
THANK YOU SO MUCH! I thought i was the only one but now I know different. I am also about to seek yet again more psychiatrist help because i fear I am also bipolar because I have been diagnosed with depression, i know i have anxiety, and terrible mood swings. Life it tough but there is hope somewhere. I can't wait to know and experience what it is like to live a normal life!