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help get off pills please Community
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Need HELP with methadone withdrawal at home.

I am (was) addicted to methadone. I took it to get off vicadin and it was cheaper. Big mistake! I have aplastic anemea which is a rare bone marrow diesese where my body doesn't produce enough blood and I've been in the hospital for weeks and weeks at a time since I was about 12, and I think that started the seduction of pain killers. I had morphine, demoral, very strong things and I simply had to push a button. I never swallowed a pill in my life before then. , I could've and would've died within days. Now on top of that I cuurently have fibromyalgia and a microedenoma (small benign tumor) on my pituitary gland in my brain.I feel like I can't deal with everything that everyone expects. I have two daughters 2, and 3 1/2. I used to ... well still do think I cant take care of them and clean the house and be a perfect little "housewife" without pills. I started with one methadone and couldn't feel it and then two at a time, 3, 4, 5, very quickly, then up to 8 sometimes 9 at a time depending on what I had to do that day. I don't work I sit at home with my girls all day every day! The only time I go out of the house is to go grocery shopping or to the doctor! It's awful, I've seculded myself and ignored any phonecalls or invitations from friends and family. I don't have a single person that I talk to outside of my husband and my mom who has no idea how deep and over my head i am. I sometimes feel like I can't go on but I'm right in a way I just cant go on being an addict. I think with some help I can do it at home. I need it to be that way- its been 6 days today without anything but ibprofin 800's n hot baths. The cravings are still there- I keep thinking I'll just tske some one day so I can clean the house since I havent moved from bed in a week and my girls have tore up the house. Is this as good as it gets? I've went a week and half and still found my way back to them- but now the 6th day I've never been this comitted to quiting. But it's hard I have a big script of lortabs waiting for me now but I can't even move to get them. Do I take them to help with withdrawals? Do I get addicted to them because it's easier to get off vics? I need help from anyone PLEASE!  and sorry for the whole life story... just need to vent! :(
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