I haven't been in this user group before, but I'm thoroughly familiar with the subject. I've been deep in anxiety all my life. Major depression, bi-polar, GAD, social phobia, some OCD. I've read dozens of self-help books, had almost 1,000 hours of therapy over the last thirty years, tried more than 19 different meds (took some of them for many years and have had all the side effect illnesses that come with them, including so many things too numerous to name that I'm dreadfully afraid may be permanent). For me, I can't remember 98% of the things I learned when I need them, but if you want to check them out try these books: Hope and Help For Your Nerves, The Instinct To Heal, and Living Well With Anxiety (What Your Doctor Doesn't Tell You... That You Need To Know). I could have saved myself a lot of time, money, health, and heartbreak, as well as my career, I think, if I had trusted Jesus and started living like it. After my fourth hospitalization (countless breakdowns) I finally found a Bible-teaching, Christ-centered (same thing) church and a Christian LPC (licensed counselor), and these are teaching me what no amount of drugs or therapy ever did... That trusting God and believing in Jesus - what He did for me, everything the Bible says God is doing for me, and that how I live really makes a difference - is not only the first REAL peace I've had, it keeps getting better as I learn more and change my thinking to accept who God says I am in the Bible. I wish I could write it all here, it's so simple but it takes a lot of words to say. Pray, tell God you're willing to accept His provision for you, then find out how (it's two different things... to know Jesus and to LIVE like you know Jesus), check out churches until you find one that is non-condemning, Jesus-loving, Bible-carrying, evangelical... Ask God to lead you to one - it will feel warm and loving, they won't be any nosier than you ask them to be in order to help you... Yes, ASK for help - call the pastors, tell them as little or as much as you want to about your situation, visit on Sunday, ask for pastoral counseling (if you're a female no sensible pastor will meet with you alone), get referral to a Christ-centered counselor or therapist (the work will be all about who you are in Christ, at least at first). Get involved in Bible-study groups, get to know PRACTICING Christian members (the pastor will help you identify them). I'm almost off Xanax and have the first hope worth mentioning about what the rest of my life is going to feel like (it's way more than that, but you'd probably not believe me if I tried to tell you here.
I majored in nutrition at college, have researched it extensively online, bought many books about it, and have spent many thousands of dollars on healthfoods, supplements, and superfoods. I've spent a fortune on alternative health practitioners, everything from chiropractors to massage therapists to acupuncturists. I'm not knocking any of that, I wish I still had the money to do it more. What I am saying is that none of that helped my anxiety enough to save my health (or, almost, my life). I lost everything to anxiety... Not once, but at least four times... Everything. I have something now that can't be taken away from me. I had it briefly 25 years ago, but I let a problem with one church make me leary of trusting another. I went to, even belonged to quite a number of churches as my anxiety drove me out of jobs and relationships and I tried moving to quieter and quieter places in search of serenity. I believe, now, that once I recover more of my physical health and get more grounded in the practical teaching needed to live a Christian life (as opposed to just calling myself Christian and going through the motions) that my surroundings won't matter to my peace. There's power in the name of Jesus... Sounds so ridiculously trite, and even silly (I hope I figure out another way to say it, but even the Bible says it sounds like foolishness to those who don't understand), until you start to live it... Then it's hard to describe but very good. If you're not experiencing it in your church life check with your pastor about Christ-centered counseling... Or find a better church.
Christian radio helps A LOT. My ideal station would be mostly bible study and sermons by the likes of Chuck Swindoll, David Jeremiah, Chip Ingram, Dennis Rainy (sp?), James Dobson, Adrian Rogers, Moody Bible Institute, and such, with some music (both contemporary and classic Gospel). But ideals are hard to come by, and I live in the boonies, so I got a radio with pre-sets and switch between the three Christian stations I can pick up (one of them actually pre-empts Christian programs with football games from a nearby "Christian" college... Grrrr!).
You can also get some of them online. Off the to of my head I know of Family Life (there are apparently several called this... the one I'm most familiar with is www.flr.org) and His Radio. You can also go to the websites of specific ministries and get their daily broadcasts on line.
But, as David Jeremiah said last night, it's no substitute for church. And as I heard a Christian comedian say one time, you may not like everything about church, but it's a lot easier to fix a boat you're in than one you're treading water outside of. Also, the ember taken from the fire and set off by itself soon cools and dies out, but it comes back to life when returned to the fellowship of other burning embers.
Interesting note to end... Just writing this resulted in trembling, difficulty breathing, accelerated thought, etc. I was about to reluctantly reach for the Xanax when a thought occurred to me... I asked Jesus... God, to remind me what I can do "instead" and I remembered some of the relaxation techniques I've ben taught but usually can't remember! Amazing! :)
Sorry, posted in wrong place!
Kat: if I may I have trouble seeing all the letters so If you don't mind. I can put on my glasses but they are shaded and if I wanted transition or otherwise I would have to wait a week and I had broke my glasses and needed them that day. I had to what I could afford to do. I agree with you in all senses of the bible. Jesus is a powerful man. The most powerful and he did die a cruel death for our sins. I was in prison for a year for something I did not do. I got beat severe enough when I got I had to have reconstructive surgery plus a scope on the same shoulder.Now I think it is infected and am getting ready to go to emergency room to get it checked for life sake. I have prayed that is all good but God will give us challenges and crosses to bear that we feel we cannot carry. It is a fact that God will not place more on our shoulders we cannot bear. I cannot place exactly where I read that in the bible and I do not have a bible to refer to right now. I have been in such a financial bind since I got out that I have to stay with my sister and her husband with their 3 year old. It is a blessing not she is here for now since I have limited use of my left arm at any given time. She told me when I woke this morning,(she was on the phone texting our brother in oklahoma all night),I at one point was crying from the pain. I was not aware of this. I have anxiety at probably close to what you described. I would go for days without sleep or rest because I was wired up. People actually thought I was a drug addict and I was taking things to try to slow me down.,The year I spent in prison did something to me I cannot describe. I was denied medical at most levels. I am disabled from the waist down on the right side since I had an accident in 1989. I just graduated from college ASE certified diesel technician and 6 months after I graduated I fell on a shaft and it missed the anus 3/4 inch and tore the sciatica nerve in the right leg. I was informed by the dr. I was seeing 5 days a week for a year I would never walk again. I walked on crutches because I refused to sit in a wheelchair. I could not sit,stand or even lay down for nearly 6 months for the pain was so great and there was no surgery that could ease the pain at the time. I nearly got addicted to pain medication and stopped taking it all together. I had faith in God all through this or I believe I would have been in a wheelchair for the remainder of my life. I was 22 and married when this happened.Anxiety which was already a major problem just went straight up from there. I was so determined and had enough faith today after 7 scope surgeries and a total knee replacement on the right knee then manipulation so it would bend and straighten I walk pretty well now. I now have the shoulder to contend with. I have the faith to do what God has given me to use in his power to overcome this also. I am getting ready to file at least 2 U.S. 1983 in the supreme court. Get my conviction overturned and get the trial I am guaranteed. I was offered a plea in the state of mississippi and lived in western kansas. I could not make to court on the appearance date I just got out of the hospital I had blacked out woke in the hospital. I think it was another diabetic coma. I have hypoglycemia and have been comas before so I feel that was what happened. My dr. faxed a letter to my lawyer (whom would not talk to me) and they refused the letter signed by a dr. and I was a day late for court.It is a 22 hour drive from where I lived to where I had to go to court. I had a wife which had a 7 year old daughter and the judicial system told me I had to plea or go to jail. I said "If I go to jail what are my wife and daughter going to do, They have to eat and it is 22 hours to home and they do not have the means to get there" they simply told me plea or your wife and daughter can go hungry while you are in jail. I was forced to plea. My brother was trying to talk to my lawyer but her refused like he is supposed to do. But the alleged victim was talking to my lawyer and finally asked my lawyer if he would talk to my brother. He agreed at that point to have a few words with him. Which is more than I got in over a year. I visited his office twice in the year and they refused to see me. I called over 100 times and spoke to him for less than one minute. He simple told me he does not investigate and will not investigate this matter. He does not make enough money to look into what is really going on. But had no problem talking to the alleged victim. I went to prison for a year and never seen my wife again. I was attempted rape by a sgt. of security. He also threatened to spray fox pepper spray in my lungs until I quit breathing after I sucked his C?C?. This is the security that is supposed to make sure you are safe from harm. I was denied medical the night I got beat nearly to death. I was so hungry I took a job in the kitchen not able to use my left arm or extend it. I was re injured in the kitchen and refused medical help once again. I was told by one of the supervisors in the kitchen "You are nothing more than a WHITE mother fu?k?r" and threatened to assault me. I am not well I have lost over 55 pounds and hypoglycemia and could not get help for is and was weak. Now what am I supposed to do.I have PTSD severely from this visit in the M.D.O.C For a crime I did not commit in the first place. I made good money and draw disability since 1993. I have the faith and looked high and low for a lawyer that would be willing to file these cases and finally found one that took an internist. If you will go to EastMississippiCorrectional Facility.com Some of the beatings talked about I was there when this happened. I was there when some inmates were beat to death and the system tried to cover them up. I am simply asking you on this rant I got going is will you pray for me my family and those who are going make me a free man I am supposed to be. So I can get back to my life and live the life God has intended for me. Thank you and God bless Jr Eden
Working from my phone is less than ideal... I answered with a post yesterday but I see it's not here. Try this, instead.. This guy says it better than I ever could -
"Trust in the Lord and do good. Then you will live safely in the land and prosper. Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust Him and He will help you. He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn, and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun. Be still in the presence of the Lord and wait patiently for Him to act. Don't worry about evil people who prosper, or fret about their wicked schemes."