Aa
How Do We Move On?
I guess I should start out with my story for this to make sense. In 2006 my dad, whom was an alcoholic all of his adult life got mad at me for not bringing him a beer back when I came home which gave him a chance to pick a fight with me. A few minutes after he yelled at me to get in his room I yelled back and said no but he yelled again so I stomped to his room pulled back his curtain to see him in his boxers leaned over his bed with a 30/30 rifle under his chin. I honestly dont know how long I stood there before he pulled the trigger but I know it wasnt long because I couldnt figure out what he was doing because I had never seen anyone use a gun that way. I was still standing there after he literally took his head off in front of me. I finally realized what had happened and ran into another room and collapsed not knowing what to do until it finally hit me to call 911. I wont go on anymore because I could go on all night, trust me I have! My point though is that it has been this many years and sometimes I feel like I cant get out of bed to face the day, still. So how do we move on?
Hello again,
I've been rereading the comments I sent in reply to your comments.
It's little wonder you never replied. Where would you begin to comment
it's so long. So, I decided to write to you again. I promise not to make
it so long this time. Please accept my deepest sympathies for the loss
of your father. I'm wondering if you might consider private one on one
counselling. What you went through would be very traumatic for anyone.
Perhaps if you had the opportunity to talk one on one with a counsellor
or therapist it would be helpful. If you're thinking there was something
you could have done to stop your father from killing himself, I can tell
you it sounds from your description like he had made up his mind to
end his life. You say, so how do we move on ? Well, for one thing we
are very gentle on ourselves and don't give ourselves a guilt trip and
when you're ready, you seek out a counsellor who will help you talk
it through. I wish you the best. I hope I hear from you. Eve :)
I've been rereading the comments I sent in reply to your comments.
It's little wonder you never replied. Where would you begin to comment
it's so long. So, I decided to write to you again. I promise not to make
it so long this time. Please accept my deepest sympathies for the loss
of your father. I'm wondering if you might consider private one on one
counselling. What you went through would be very traumatic for anyone.
Perhaps if you had the opportunity to talk one on one with a counsellor
or therapist it would be helpful. If you're thinking there was something
you could have done to stop your father from killing himself, I can tell
you it sounds from your description like he had made up his mind to
end his life. You say, so how do we move on ? Well, for one thing we
are very gentle on ourselves and don't give ourselves a guilt trip and
when you're ready, you seek out a counsellor who will help you talk
it through. I wish you the best. I hope I hear from you. Eve :)
Hi apeyhaver,
I just finished reading your comments. My father passed away almost nine
years ago now. He died as a result of complications of a stroke he had had
many years prior to that. Please accept my deepest sympathies for the
loss of your father. I'm not going to say, I know how you feel about your
father's death. It much be absolutely surreal to have your own father take
his own life right infront of you. Just know that none of this is your fault.
Even reading your description of what your dad did is horrifying.
Are you going through a depression, apeyhaver ? It sounds a bit like
you do, especially your reference to sometimes feeling like you can't get
out of bed to face the day. I will share with you the fact that I experienced
a depression about twelve years ago. So I know first hand the feeling
of not wanting to get out of a bed to face the day. You ask, how do
I move on? Before I answer your question, I will tell you why I decided
to join this forum. Last year a man I had dated for a little while, took his
own life. This was after a mutual decision to end the relationship. A good
friend of mine who knew this man, told me in an email that the man I had
dated and cared about, but not loved, had taken his own life. Here it is
a year already and I'm still feeling sad about it. You should know the
man who committed suicide was very religious, Catholic infact. I'm spiritual but not Catholic. That was one of many differences between us. I don't
feel guilty. I know his death was not my fault. We went our separate ways.
My friend had told me that he had gotten into a very deep depression and
that he was having a really hard time feeling better. That's why I decided to join this forum about people we care about taking their own life.
Back to what you're dealing with. Witnessing your father taking his own
life has to be very traumatic and no doubt surreal. Do you wonder if there
was anything else you could have done to prevent your dad's death?
These are normal questions that one would ask of oneself when something
like this happens as well as a whole bunch of other questions no doubt.
When I was going through my depression, not only did I get medication
to help me deal with it, I also went to group counselling which I found
very helpful. I don't think group counselling would be helpful for you at
this point in time. I think if you can go for private counselling and have
an opportunity to talk about whatever you want to talk about, that might
be helpful for you. I hope what I have said you will find helpful. Take
good care of yourself. Good wishes, Eve
I just finished reading your comments. My father passed away almost nine
years ago now. He died as a result of complications of a stroke he had had
many years prior to that. Please accept my deepest sympathies for the
loss of your father. I'm not going to say, I know how you feel about your
father's death. It much be absolutely surreal to have your own father take
his own life right infront of you. Just know that none of this is your fault.
Even reading your description of what your dad did is horrifying.
Are you going through a depression, apeyhaver ? It sounds a bit like
you do, especially your reference to sometimes feeling like you can't get
out of bed to face the day. I will share with you the fact that I experienced
a depression about twelve years ago. So I know first hand the feeling
of not wanting to get out of a bed to face the day. You ask, how do
I move on? Before I answer your question, I will tell you why I decided
to join this forum. Last year a man I had dated for a little while, took his
own life. This was after a mutual decision to end the relationship. A good
friend of mine who knew this man, told me in an email that the man I had
dated and cared about, but not loved, had taken his own life. Here it is
a year already and I'm still feeling sad about it. You should know the
man who committed suicide was very religious, Catholic infact. I'm spiritual but not Catholic. That was one of many differences between us. I don't
feel guilty. I know his death was not my fault. We went our separate ways.
My friend had told me that he had gotten into a very deep depression and
that he was having a really hard time feeling better. That's why I decided to join this forum about people we care about taking their own life.
Back to what you're dealing with. Witnessing your father taking his own
life has to be very traumatic and no doubt surreal. Do you wonder if there
was anything else you could have done to prevent your dad's death?
These are normal questions that one would ask of oneself when something
like this happens as well as a whole bunch of other questions no doubt.
When I was going through my depression, not only did I get medication
to help me deal with it, I also went to group counselling which I found
very helpful. I don't think group counselling would be helpful for you at
this point in time. I think if you can go for private counselling and have
an opportunity to talk about whatever you want to talk about, that might
be helpful for you. I hope what I have said you will find helpful. Take
good care of yourself. Good wishes, Eve
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