So does that mean I'm bi ?
I have exacly the same problem. As you have read my post about hocd, My stress levels have decreased the last weeks. I try to remove the thoughts by saying "whatever" or "So what if I'm gay", "I just need to live a happy life". Before my anxiety and stress levels was so high my brain went nuts litterly. And the symptoms you have were the same as mine. But one difference is that I have no evidence that I'm bisexual/gay. I was also depressed alot and stressed so much I wanted it to end. My anxiety is still there, everyday thinking about it. Sometimes it's a bit extreme and I still avoid eye contact and physical contact with the same gender. My heart is unease all the time. Sometimes it just pops up and I cant get it out of my mind.
I wouldn't care what other people would think of me they could know I'm gay but as long as I know I'm not I would be fine with it. What is going on with me
I'm so scared it might not be hocd, I know I have had OCD for a long time, and all this questing came from one thought that I couldn't get rid of. I was 100% sure I was straight not once in my life have I questioned my sexuality. I don't wanna be with a female it's making me feel really alien and uncomfortable, will I ever get back to normal again ?? Or did I just turn gay/ bi ?? Or did I just find out now ?I am so scared I have a boyfriend and his worried about me because I have lost a lot of weight and became really depressed. And I don't wanna tell him because I'm scared he'll think I'm bi and leave me the word bi spikes me
From what you have said, I believe you have HOCD.
Thank you so much! But do you think this is hocd or denial because I'm really scared and need so reassurance please. I know I don't like girls and I never did in anyway, but my mind is saying something different because I watched porn and it's saying that it is a Sign but I know it isn't and it's really confusing ☹ the thoughts are making me really uncomfortable, and the idea of being somethings else other than straight makes my stomach turn and gives me anxiety and makes me feel really uncomfortable and uneasy:( is this hocd or denial ??
You have lost your sex drive because you cannot get out of your own head. Trust me when I have been in crisis mode, which is what I think you are in, who can even think about sex. It is the last thing I care about honestly. You are fixated on this because you are having HOCD/Bi-OCD thoughts. I'm glad you are seeing a therapist. You can try to do some meditation videos on YouTube for now. Also you can try this breathing technique to calm yourself down. You take a deep breath in through your nose, hold it for 5 seconds and count this out in your head, then let it all out through your mouth. Try this laying down at first with your hands on your stomach. You can do this technique anywhere at any time and nobody will even know you are doing it. Also stop the thought when it starts with statements such as "NO, I'M NOT GOING THERE AGAIN!" Also you can try to give in to the thought. The more you give in with a "WHATEVER" statement, the easier it will go away. It doesn't mean you believe the thought but rather you are just saying "whatever" because you know it means nothing. Try it. The reality is if you stood up right now and said "I'm Gay" you probably wouldn't want to run out and get a girlfriend and be intimate with her therefore you could not possibly be gay. People that are gay know it and they don't fight it like you are doing. Also I believe it is genetic. You don't wake up one day and become gay. It just doesn't work like that. Hang in there and try some of the things I have written. You need to take an active role in helping yourself because we cannot fix you, only you can do that with patience and practice.
Can someone please help me, since I lost my sex drive my mind is telling me I never liked straight sex and that I will enjoy G__ sex more and it's so scary
Okay I'm sorry I was spiking I feel back to normal straight !! Hahah for now
Sometimes it feel like I'm in denial because I lost my sex drive an attraction, and I have thiughts of killing myself because I honestly would rather die than be with a woman or like her in any other way than friendship I'm so confused !!
Please catch me up on your age and whether or not you have seen a therapist? The thing about OCD is it changes. It is called the doubting disease. When it is left unchecked it goes on and on and then you start to get new "What-if" statements. So now you have gone from HOCD to Bi-OCD. Your brain simply won't let you rest. In order to get that much needed rest you should ideally see a psychologist and perhaps a psychiatrist for some medication. You can take a low dose tranquilizer like klonopin just to help you initially while you are learning CBT from your psychologist. Sometimes we are in it so long that we forget what it feels like to be normal.
I keep checking mentally n sometimes with porn I'm on my phone 24/7 looking for answers and checking and testing until u get the result in happy with I feel happy when I feel straight or when I prove to myself that I'm in fact straight
evidence that I have hocd-
I never question my sexuality
I feel anxious and depressed
I'm scared that I will like the same sex
I'm scared that if I experiment I will like it
I think about it 24/7 no stop
I have lost my make attraction
Thinking of a girl feel weird and alien
I hate the thoughts
I get really warm n really hot when I think about it
I feel hopeless
Porn addiction
Evidence I might be bi/ gay
I used to watch lesbian porn
I had 1 or two lesbian fantasies throughout my whole life
Which I believe were caused by porn
I had 3/4 gay dreams before my hocd kicked in which I also believe we're induced by lesbian porn I used to watch it a lot when I got bored of straight porn n the things I found disgusting started arousing me
Evidence I'm straight
Never in my life I had a crush on a girl
I'm boy crazy
I slept with many guys and enjoyed it
Never question my sexuality always felt comfortable and proud to be straight
I love men they fulfill me
I never felt like there was something missing
I had many boyfriends
Never thought of a girl in a sexual way
Never got turned on by a girl ( just their action in porn)
I don't find female body arousing
I was never aroused by a girl
My first crush was on a boy
I had crushes on guys since I was 5/6
Never felt like I was in a closet
The thought of being with a girl scared the **** out of me
I know your probably tired of me posting the same thing but I can't treat it like OCD if it not I wanna know that this is hocd not be actually being
Being bi doesn't feel right to me I'm so scared please help I'm literally going crazy I honestly to go don't wanna be bi it puts me into depression