Is this normal?

[purplegirl4]

Ok my youngest is almost 9 (male) he is the 3rd boy I have raised ( other 2 are 28/25) My oldest daughter has a son he is 5.. 1.5 yrs ago she put both the boys int he bath tub at her house... she claims my son said inappropriate things to her son and made suggestions to him as well... My son said he never said anything except for his cousin to not say things and not try to get him to touch him!!!  My daughter is BLOWING this way out of context this is going on 1.5 yrs now I can not have my grandson here nor my granddaughter either as she FEARS that my son will HARM them!!!!! Also they can come here or go with me IF she goes or comes as well // they came over and her son was grabbing my son BUT or course she said my lil 5 yr old would NEVER do that and if he did he wouldn't know the concept!!! I am FURIOUS and hurt that she is so SELF CENTERED and her children are PERFECT and do no wrong... Our son is home schooled her son goes to public school and rides the bus as well.... There are lots of factors that point to him seeing things that would allow him to know these things.. Our son is around ALL differnet ages of children-boys and girls---We are members of a church which we are ACTIVLEY involved in... Lots of children coming to our home..ect ect... NO ONE EVER has made this remarks about our son????

[specialmom]

Sorry for this family problem, it sounds hard!  I would be hurt by false allegations about my child whom I adore.  For sure. But I have to ask you, what do you think her motive would be to make this up?  With so many kids around, could your 9 year old have repeated something another has said in front of him or something he's seen?  I think I'd have had a serious talk with my son wanting him to telling me the truth and knowing that this is tricky with kids so also trying to talk about things that he needs to be aware of (like what is okay to say and do with other kids and what isn't---  and if anyone has ever done that with him, he needs to feel safe to tell you).  

In reality, her reaction while a bit much is probably what most parents would do if they were believing in their heart that the other child said/did things.  And it is in everyone (including your son's) that he not be alone with her child again because if they are false allegations, you don't want more made.  Your son is safer not around her kid if her kid is accusing of things that didn't  happen.  It's awkward because of family but it is what it is.  I would do your best to find a way to have a relationship and time with her kids so they don't suffer.  Will she bring her kids around with the whole family there?