It doesn't sound like herpes - and unless your husband has herpes, it wouldn't be. Have either of you ever tested? Can you get a copy of your blood tests?
If you get BV, spraying perfumes and deodorants is not a good idea. The vagina is like a self-cleaning oven, except the vagina does it with a very delicate balance of good and bad bacteria that helps keep everything in check. If you are getting BV, yours isn't in check.
Try wearing 100% cotton underwear, using NOTHING that is scented - toilet paper, soap, washes, detergents, etc., don't douche unless told to by a doctor. You might also try a probiotic. Jarrow makes a good one - http://www.jarrow.com/product/484/Fem-Dophilus It's expensive, so if you can't afford this one (and that is totally understandable), look for something with similar ingredients.
Also my vagina got red and swollen and I think I made my bv worse and got a yeast infection because I had a itchy rash on my inner thighs but when I used monistat 7 day I seen improvement the 2nd day and by the 3rd day the discharge was gone then the itching went away