I am very sorry to hear that your son is having this rare and serious problem. I would recommend that you seek the best surgeon you can find, and also that you review the web site, rapidsternalclosure.com for a method of stabilizing his sternum post surgery. For redos this will assist the surgeon , and could facilitate a re-entry if necessary. Remember that a second opinion is not an insult to your doctor, and it may help you understand your sons problem better. It will probably not make you change physicians, but have more faith in the one you are working with.
arch s miller III ms md facs, reconstructive surgery forum
I'm so sorry to read that your son is facing a 3rd valve surgery. I'm sure he is frustrated. Does the doctor feel confident that this surgery will be more successful? Is he going to the same surgeon, facility? Hopefully, he feels some sense of wellness with his choice of surgeon, etc.
I do know there are people who have had multiple valve surgeries, some 3 or 4 times. Age is definitely in your son's favor. Hang in there and know that you are not alone.
connie