Jan 31, 2012
I was just sitting here thinking that I can't believe I'm in my 19th week of pregnancy (my tracker is off). On Monday I go for a fetal echocardiogram and my next ob/gyn appt. I continue to pray that everything continues to go well.
I still get worried about the little things and I am sure that is normal but the changes in your body are unbelievable I worry Im not eating enough, gaining enough weight, etc. I discovered the other day some weird markings under my breat nipples,not sure what it is but its almost like a black and blue mark. They were sore and have been snice the day I found I was pregnant but it seems to be better now. I'll ask he ob/gyn on Monday. It's hard not to want to call her every five minutes with a new discovery or worry. I keep telling myself its because you are pregnant and leave it at that.
I finally picked out bedding, colors and everything for the nursery. It's funny because I never expected to have boys. It sounds odd but even as I was picking out my donor, I only thought of how my pretty or attractive my girls would look - I looked for the donor as a girl donor only lol. I never said I wonder how a boy will look from my donor. I think I never once thought about being a mom of boys, kind of strange I guess. I always thought of my children being girls. I guess I should have been a little more open minded. But I am so happy to have my blue angels in my life and look forward to experience motherhood with them.
We are still struggling with another boy name, just can't come up with one that we both like. I know we have time but I feel bad referring to them as Michael and "what's his name."
My baby shower is booked for April 14th. I'm excited, I never dreamed I would get this far and I am really looking forward to it. I haven't bought one baby item myself yet, still feeling nervous about jinxing myself or something.
I started to clean out what was our computer room for the boys. I am so tired all the time, I do one thing and I'm ready for a nap. I find this the most frustrating, losing control of everything. I've gotten better with time learning the last few months there are things that are going to fall behind and I have to learn to accept and walk away. I'm guessing this is just the beginning though.
The one good thing is without having classes I've had more time to do my writing. I already wrote one story for my boys explaining how they came to be. Just one in a series I plan to write, each one being age appropriate. I don't write for children usually so its been a challenge for me.
I didn't watch the Dr. Oz special last week. I have it on my dvr but not so sure I want to watch it. From what I've read online here, there seems to be a lot of disappointment in the negativity of the show. Who needs that after all tha we've been through to get here. I may not watch it ever.
Anyway, I will write about my appointment on Monday. It's going to be a long day. I'm tired already and I still have to work from home today starting at 4.
I hope all of you ladies who are ttc, hang on to your dreams and never give up hope. To all of the women who have recently gotten their BFP's, congrats and enjoy it as much as possible. For everyone I hope good things are happening in your world.