All Journal Entries Journals
Sort By:  


Aug 26, 2015 - 0 comments

I'm really having a good couple of days! Tennis may be the replacement for SA.

I need to just continue to do my affirmations. I believe that in a little while I will begin to see more progress. I just need to convince myself fully that SA is a lie!

I looked and skirted today, but this time I spent less time looking. I quit earlier than ever. The reason I quit was because I finally realized (again) that it was a lie. I wasn't going to be fooled into going deeper into looking at porn. I believe affirmations are helping. I'm trying to do them 4 times a day.

However, I believe the reason I did look and skirt was because I did not do affirmations #2 AS SOON AS I GOT HOME! Lesson learned and the correction it noted.


Aug 25, 2015 - 0 comments

Much better day today. I did only worthwhile things. I had one time today where improper thoughts came to me and I just began to dwell on them...just a little. But I rejected them and got out of it.

Keep on digging and keep on doing worthwhile things. Establish NEW rituals. Keep affirmations going.


Aug 24, 2015 - 0 comments

Well, the day is pretty much finishing out. I did affirmations twice. They seem to be working, but maybe I need to do them for a while before I stop skirting altogether. I skirted today. What a shame because I didn't even have that deep desire to. I was just a little down about not having a real job and having trouble with my current job. It's such a pain. I do have affirmations that even when I have trouble I don' t act out. My job *****!

I really need to take the next step. I've made progress, but I don't want to plateau. I need to to something else besides skirting.  

I feel as though I am taking advantage of my soft boundaries. Just need to trust with whole heart, affirmations.



Aug 24, 2015 - 0 comments

I had a good two days with no skirting or acting out. Today, I skirted a little but found some strength to resist. We'll have to see how the rest of the day goes. I NEED TO KEEP DOING MY AFFIRMATIONS 4 TIMES A DAY! In those affirmations I declare trust in Jesus.

I know it hasn't been a perfectly clean 12 days of sobriety, though I haven't acted out with hardcore crap. But I also didn't want to become discouraged by constantly starting 3 again?! So I am counting progress (but also not viewing hardcore stuff). Today and tomorrow I am all alone. These are the toughest days, but the more times I can stay on task the easier I believe it will become.

My next affirmation is at about 11:00.

If I do make it to 30 days, I will upload a 30 day medallion pic from AA.