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Almost over!!!!!!

Jul 31, 2012 - 10 comments

New hcg levels today in at 3356.

I'm oh so close!!! This as been such a crazy experience but I wouldn't change a thing. I needed to let my body do this for my emotional well being. I definitely feel like I've accepted and even healed from this loss. Maybe it was the gradual decrease in hcg that helped me mellow, maybe it was all the prayers... But I'm definitely in a good place these days (thank the Lord!).

I'm betting the physical isn't going to be bad at all... I just know it. My stomach just *feels* small... Like there isn't much in there but a thick lining. So maybe there is another benefit to have waited all this out!!

Not sure how I feel about TTC anymore.... I have a feeling I may not be able to stop trying just yet lol.

Having a very rough day.

Jul 01, 2012 - 22 comments

Been sleeping an awful lot just to avoid it all. The worst part is it's not yet over. My body still thinks its pregnant and it's messing with my mind/heart with all the 'what ifs.' I know there have been errors on some women but I'm sure this is not my case. BUT just for the sake of peace of mind I will wait till 9-10 weeks before I terminate.

In the mean time I feel so very low and confused. I'm afraid of the actual event of miscarriage... How bad will it be? Will it end up with me in the hospital? When will it happen? Because clearly my body hasn't gotten the memo that this pregnancy is doomed. I have no spotting, bbs are still sore and I'm peeing all the time and through the night. My hubby won't face reality... He thinks they made an error and wants me to go on as if I'm pregnant but I CANNOT!!! It's killing me not having this resolved.

New labs are in

Jun 05, 2012 - 21 comments

Here's the # story so far...

10 dpo-- hcg 11 prog 7.2

12 dpo-- hcg 65 prog 21.8

14dpo-- hcg 177 prog 21.2

22dpo-- hcg 2806 prog 23


8weeks 4 days-- hcg 88,816 prog 25.7 e2 896


Jun 01, 2012 - 10 comments

So I was really worried that my beta came in so low (11) and I just got the progesterone result and its only 7.2!!!!!

I am officially in freak out zone.

Thank God I went against Dr orders yesterday and started prometrium. They wanted me to wait to see the levels first. Let's see if they even contact me!