Apr 16, 2011
I feel like all I do is complain on here. But honestly, this is an outlet. I'm kinda funny about talking about my feelings in person, although I am very quick to share any medical details with anyone who asks. So a place like this where I can have a pity party for myself, or at least express myself honestly, is actually very helpful.
Yesterday was my last day of work and I am heartbroken. I had no idea I would feel this way. I have never cried at the end of the year. When I switched teaching jobs, I happily skipped from the old to the new. I was always just ready for the next step, the next challenge. Helps that I always loved my job, and felt I was good at it. I guess part of my sadness is because I am not leaving on my own terms, and I didn't feel like my work there was done. It also makes it reality that this is happening to me and I have to have surgery. Less than 2 weeks to go... I cried all the way home. I'm not a crier. I cried more yesterday than I have cumulatively since I got my diagnosis.