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Its been a long time...

Jan 07, 2017 - 0 comments

Its been a while since I logged on, a lot has changed for me since. I am married and have two beautiful toddler boys, Noah and Isaac. Being a mom is tough, but rewarding. I've been finding myself getting overwhelmed and depressed at times, my little one Isaac 21 months old has been suffering from chronic otitis media.I have an taking him to the doctors since July 19, 2016 it's been about 7 months of pain and suffering for him and for me, it breaks my heart that I can't help him find relief. I feel like I failed him. It wasn't until 12/9 that his docor referred him to the ears nose and throat specialist after treating him with anibiotics after antibiotics. He had an ear infection for 6 months before they did an ear culture and discovered he had a candida fungal infection. I found out his surgery is going to cost about $2050 for ear tubes, and $750 of it has to be paid the day of the surgery. I couldn't help but to feel like I failed Isaac, I took an intermittent FMLA at work because my boss is on the verge out firing me because my work performance isn't where he thinks it should be and I've missed so much work having to pick up Isaac from daycare and take him to the boss is right I guess my work performance has been affected all I can do is worry and think about my little boy. I was use to getting $1050 every 2 weeks now my check is averaging $765 every two weeks, I felt so much distress how am I going to pay a stupid seat belt fine, and pay for my registration and pay for this surgery when I have nothing left it all goes to daycare and husband's check pays for food and utilities...I started selling items on eBay which is a slow beginning at trying to boost a little extra money. My sister made a go fund me page for isaac which brought me to tears the 9 people that donated raised $460 towards Isaacs surgery. I feel greatful for these people to care about my son so much. Here come Monday I'll have enough raised to schedule his surgery. If you can keep my kiddo in your prayers he has had intermittent fever, vomitting, ear discharge, fussiness bloating, diarrhea, change in appetite, clammy night sweats, ear pain, lethargy and looks flushed and has dark bags under his eyes. I want him to get better so bad, everyday when I look at his face and I,to his I feel like he is screaming for help, and for the first time I feel like I failed my child.

10/08/12 - positive hcg test????

Oct 08, 2012 - 3 comments









false positive

i haven't had a normal period history, and i've been off birth control for about 2-2.5 years, i've been feeling very emotional, irritable, i feel bloated, constipated, and i feel like i'm eating more than is usual. I took a pregnancy test, because lets face it, i'm paranoid. I took the test this morning, and it showed up with two lines, the first line a dark pink color and the second line was faded or lighter than the first line - it was one of those cheap $1.00 tests from dollar tree, could this mean i might really be pregnant????

I am going to treat this as a false positive and wait 3 days then take a two more tests using first response. if these turn out positive then i will see a doctor.

I've been taking vitex (chasteberry) for one week along with fish oil liquid gel and my womens one a day vitamin, could vitex cause a false positive?

Can anyone give me advise, or console me somehow, i feel anxious, nervous, scared, but the other part of me thinks this could be a good thing too. i don't know....

September 25, 2012

Sep 25, 2012 - 0 comments









latent period

so i've taken prozac, paroxetine, hydroxyzine, and trazadone over the past 7 years, i've also taken tramadol for 2.5 years due to severe pain before/during/after my period. The past 2 and a half years i've noticed that my pain is not as severe, however, my periods are still scanty and imbalanced, i at times miss a month. I presume this may be due the hormonal imbalance i was diagnosed with 3 years back or so  (progesterone/estrogen) considering that i had what appeared to be lactation from my nipple.

I frequently suffer from depression, irritability, hopelessness, cramps, bloating, constipation/diarrhea, crying spells, food cravings - normally chocolate or sweets, fatigue, and thoughts of suicide. These problems have been severe for the past 4 months. I started taking 20 mg of paroxetine, however the effects were too unbearable: drowsiness, dizziness, headaches, nausea, violent diarrhea, difficulty remembering things/forgetfulness, and inability to orgasm/low sex drive.  

I would like to take xanax, but benzo's are addictive and one may develope a dependency on them or even need the dosage to be stepped up. Withdrawls and tapering off them can be difficult.

I have stopped taking prescribed ssri's, and am thinking about taking an all natural approach.


I am nervous about the irregularity of my menses, and am fearful of not being able to conceive due to my irregularity, however, i am not taking the pill to conceive.

i read that this herbal supplement increases your chances of conceiving...i really wish anyone at all could shed some light on this for me. don't get me wrong i'd be ecstatic to have a baby, I am 27 - no children, and would love to be a mother, but i'm afraid right now isn't the time for it....nobody can ever really be prepared for this......but i work part time, i drive 40 miles a day to and from work, my boyfriend works part time, we can barely afford to take care of eachother let alone a kid, so perhaps its best to wait.

I thought spermicidal lube would be a great alternative but i read that you can get vaginal infections from too much use.

can anyone tell me what the chances are of conceiving while taking vitex and if it is ok to use spermicidal lube frequetly (each time 15 minutes before intercourse) ?



Sep 17, 2012 - 0 comments

Paroxetine 20 mg




Chastetree berry

i am currently on paroxetine 20 mg, nothing has changed for me since before i have taken this medication. I am really nuts! not to self diagnose myself, but i sincerely believe i may have PMDD, i read about it and have nearly every symptoms, and have been diagnosed with panic disorder and progesterone/estrogen imbalance. my periods are never normal, i've been off birthcontrol for 2 years - trying to let my body detox from them and regulate naturally, i have been sexually active for the past 2 and a half years, worries about conceiving pop up in my head since i'm 27 and have not had any children yet, i often get concerned that i will not be able to have any kids. I am always stressing, feeling overwhelmed, no engery, feel tired and fatigued, i feel over emotional or get angry easily, i sometimes feel i'm not good enough, i get crying spells, sometimes i may get a dizzy spell, and i have menstrual pain even when i'm not having a period.

Anyhow, i started 20mg of paroxetine Tuesday September 11, 2012

during this 6 days i've experienced the following symptoms:

- moderate headaches
- severe diahrrea
- nausea
- mild hallucinations (peripherals)
- severe memory loss (can't remember what i was doing, where i was going, what i was going to do, can't remember where i put things)
- innability / delayed orgasm
- dizziness
- Confusion

this is day 7, despite the fact that i have not had any emotional crying spells, or moodiness i have decided to stop taking them. i know it is better to give pills time but to be honest they are causing me more problems then they are worth.

i read about chastetree berrries and how they are used to alleviate symptoms or treat pmdd
and feel like i would be better off doing this. i need a medication that will not affect my job. I think maybe i'll consult a pharmicist about taking chastree berry and i will report back here what that does for me, i will also consult my doctor and see what it takes to check to see if i have PMDD.