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Day (7)

Oct 09, 2008 - 1 comments

It's 10:00 AM PST here in Vegas and I'm on Day (7) of jumpin off Subs.  I feel Great!!!!!!!!  Now I skipped a few days of the journal thing mostly because I was kinda depressed with all the misery since Day (4).  That's the day I joined this site.  Now don't get me wrong up till now I could not really say I felt great but right now this second and for the past hour I feel friggin amazing!!!!!

BUT gettin here meant ignoring the pain and the misery and lethargy and forcing myself onto a bicycle each morning no matter what my legs felt like or my stomach or my head and I think that helped most of all.

Day 4

Oct 06, 2008 - 0 comments

Today is the 4th day of my liberation from prescription drugs.  I am 43 years old, a father of a beautiful 5 yr old daughter and a wonderful wife.  I have two dogs and somehow, a career of sorts.  I have these things and yet I am in agony!  I suffer secretively, alone.  My family thinks I have a really bad flu.  I am too ashamed to confess to my wife that I have fallen to this scourge.  Now, I fight this thing inside me that has taken over my mind and body and it won't let go.

Today, I needed help.  I came here to this website after googling  "suboxone" and "withdrawal" and "help" and so here I am.  I posted, asking for tips and someone helped.  I don't feel so alone.

The good news is that I am actually quasi-functioning, really just muscling thru this thing with hot baths and scented homeopathic oils, short but fairly rigorous bike rides (more baths) potent liquid vitamins, teas water juices grapefruit bananas anything possible.  I also learned by trial and tribulation that crying seems to help...Its cathartic, maybe even cleansing.  

I have learned that kicking suboxone is tougher than hydocodone or percs or even Oxy.  But I have also learned that some of you out there have done it.  I am convinced that if its possible to lead a normal life after this, well then I will.

Getting to Day 4 was no fun.  It was sheer agony, misery, malaise.  But I am here.  I will not look back.  I will never again let something own me.  I am free.  I just need to keeping walking away from that thing and  back home.  My wife and kid are there waiting me to come back, waiting for the husband and father they once knew.  They've no idea where I've been nor do they know that stranger who took my place for so long!  Well that guy is fading fast and I'm Back!!!!