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Feb 14, 2014 - 1 comments

I just read on the net that some one was saying what i was thinking aqain about the 'Time Scale' for WD's and what day what may happen. And they were saying the same as i wonderd the way i went before. Each drop for say day 1 it would start very quickly and day 2 3 was not so hot. Then a good patch then WA,M!! day 6-7 when most people are over the worst of it it gets really dad? Thats why i had a rethink about when to do another 10mg drop today.

'm getting Fluey again but can handle it so far plus a few things on top. So instead of thinking (which i wasn't sure about) GO FOR IT!! Im going to see how day 5 goes maybe up to 7? I never let it go past 7 and once went to day 9 then dropped of more. But like i said there ARE improvements in other area's i am grateful for. But i'm also aware it can come kick yor butt to!! I stay at 60mg to day as MUCH as i want to go down BUT i know how it can catch you no warning?


Feb 14, 2014 - 0 comments

is 80% better. I have to wear gloves layers of clothing and a wooly hat plus thermal underwear INDOORS i havent had to do ANY of that today. I couldn't get things from the Fridge without Gloves or pain from the cold as soon as i opened the door.........bare hands took food out and never even THOUGHT about it? I daren't do THAT usually. Last night i went out in the pouring down rain and freeing wind. I stepped in a puddle i the dark i didn't see the boots i had on,  i'd forgotten to put my rubber ones on, but the ones i did were Suedette so they got soaked in seconds and i was waiting to end up in dire straights in a second. It never happened, i was ables to carry on do what i was doing for an hour then go home and ok.

the swellings gone down and they been swollen and painful for a couple of years or longer?
this has improved 70%? i was constantly washing and changing as WD's were causing it. Its a Classic 'Detox' symptom

was zilch! i am starving!!

it felt like i was trying to wear my shoulders a earrings as i couldnt stop the hunching up and the pain was awful!! 60% better pain nothing to write home about to what it was.

was dreadful!! Its stopped and i now need to take something to go? by now i am begging for mercy!! and that's if i miss one pill?

70% better. I walked for over an hour with no discomfort or laboured breathing like i been doing for ages now.

quite mellow and crying but i NEED TO CRY i've not been able to Grieve for my Mother and this in turn was killing me!! Holding something in or IT being held by your mind will make you really ill! To the point of life endangering! I nearly died from Seizures and Anaphalaxic Shock due to stress and being unable to Grieve. The crying is a GREAT release

Anything else of note i will Journal later

My Journal gone in to only friends comments? I never did it i put EVERYONE

Feb 14, 2014 - 0 comments

How do you SET Journal so EVERYONE xx can COMMENT? I don't know why but mines Auto Set it's self to ''FRIENDS ONLY'' how do you put it back so EVERYONE can Comment please? THANK YOU <3 Boo yaka!!! :-D xxx


Feb 14, 2014 - 0 comments

I am still cautiously hopeful ok, i'm not saying i am 'mrs normal' BUT what i am saying is so far the symptoms of WD aren't too bad considering when you usually taper Oxy's its so awful it's un real!! I mean Codine.s not great but it's seems to be in my opinion over with quicker, but this time doing it CT it i'm of a mind that some of the WD smptoms are being enhanced mind, they do say WD physically effects you for what? A month?

But i think it may be longer that's a 'Ball Park' figure really isint it? And i'm sure people seeing a week to 2 think there's some thing wrong with them when they feel awful for longer? And another thing that helps and i know some people wont agree is..being younger.

I had the will of a Lion when i was younger! I never even noticed much when i stopped DHCodine after taking  400mg Daily? I did feel under a heavy black cloud, but it was mentally it got me i didnt get your usual aches or the 'Flu'' but down... No DR EVER warns you about what's going to happen with these drug's and i'm sure if people knew more they'd stay the hell away from them!

My friends that but off the street, it seems to be different area's favour different drug's one more than the other. In the City it's kinda 'All sort's' BUT that being said we are in the 'Top 3 Cities' in UK according to who ever does these dumb survey's and ONE idiot's opinion is believed by more Dumb head's? But it is vibrant if your on the right side of the fence like anywhere

Now back to this i said 'Herb' but it's a 'Root' i really, really did NOT want to take any more Oxy's quickly after i took it or Diazapam and i mean i sit here fighting with my Mind everday saying 'GO ON! GO ON! you know you need to because if you don't'' then getting more and more paranoid by the second and in the end i quickly THINK myself in to WD symptoms BUT that don't happen after i take it? SO...fingers and toes crossed i truly feel God has sent it i swear'

I am not feeling you know like some people get 'Euphoric' i had THAT one and boy!! talk about crash and burn really quickly like a Candle in a Rain storm? BAD! BAD! BAD! And that's what makes you feel worse then, it's like being given the key to your prison cell only to be pushed back in by some unseen evil laughing while your feeling all your hope just flew away forever?

I have learned now that it THAT does happen DON'T let it win! DO NOT SUBMIT TO IT!!! Even if you have to drag yourself around feeling like your trapped in the 'Void of Despair and NO escape' DO NOT SUBMIT!!! By this i mean don't lay down unless physically your body comes to a halt even if you DO want to move.

I have often felt like that and once i get going then things start to roll along and your gonna surprise youself by how much you CAN DO, if only you STOP the negative speech your allowing your mind to tell you it will LIE to you and the second it know's you letting it suppress you boy oh boy!!

it REALLY takes the **** outta you then. Well if we roll ove, leg's in the air it's gonna stamp all over us. Look don't you wonder why other people in the same position as yo tend yo seem th be flying through everything and you can only lay down? Well it's NOT that they got some super power you lack, the ONLY difference is they get up and DO IT!! They may feel worse than you know but it's true you can't judge a book by it's cover at all.

YOU have to be the 'AUTHOR' of your own book the same as anyone else and that's another reason i think as many of us should keep a 'Journal' on here as possible, it's easier to put the PC or mobile phone on and log on. You can then read what others have written and then try something they did that's the way it works.

Even thinking about some one elses word's can ignight a much needed flame and to be able to go rea what YOU been writing day after day and put EVERYTHING your doing, did up here so if you find your coping better on certain day's you can see what was it you did that helped?

There's nothing worse than crashing just as you feel your picking up and you can't remember what you did on the day's you felt that bad or worse to enable you to help yourself? And try as you might you can't work it out and then THAT adds to your misery. So don't just put i 'Jumped' or CT's Or. 'Tapered. You so need ALL the info you can type at the time as it may be something so tiny that did a big Miracle and you can't remember?

And i am keeping a CLOSE eye on the actions, doses, and times i take this root and today i am going to split the doses in to smaller ones as the first dose i took was twice what i took to the half i had yesterday about 4pm? So im going to do it through out the day today. And the other GREAT THING is after i took it i never took any pill's for 2o hours? and i take nearly all my daily dose by 11am and hang on until 3pm and gone!!

And just put up with WD's as mine start reall quickly anything from 20mins and it's bad by that point. But i can go hours and not think about it and the actual life of the pill's seem's stronger? But without swallowing big handfulls to get that effect AND i feel tired like i could sleep tired very quickly as well. And this morning? NO runs, NO urgency to take them at all!! The morning i an in a right 'Dying mode' and the head mess gut's, joints' all the usual suspects.

In fact i am debating if i should go back to bed?? I am literally falling asleep typing!! WOW! The ONLY times that's ever happened is when i was drinking too much before i went CT off the booze and i'd fall asleep face down on with everyone else at it? I think it's a BAD place for ANYONE with problems to be FB, its dangerous! I saw some awful things on there and getting MSG's from people the other side of the World telling you their gonna kill their self???

Then they SELL your life to the host of companies who ALL buy repetition and put your life all over the Net and call it 'Entertainment? Thats another thing you GOT to break, if your aware of it or not we ALL have some kind of 'Ritual' associated with our problem i seen it not just in myself, but many other's. EG..i had this 'thing' i had to drink Coffee with EVERY pill for it to work and the Coffee was also causing me problems and terrible pain but i still did it?

And so i stopped it abruptly then had to go from a gallon a day to  4 cups because of WD's from that was bad as well, But now i don't even like the taste and it's deffinately that root!! Another thing as well it gives you energy if your worn out, you can feel it going around your body all safe an warm and comfortable and as i stated in the page before this one i went on GOVERNMENT WEBSITES  where they have done MEDICAL RESEARCH on this stuff and there is no SIDE EFFECTS or CONTRAINDICATIONS at all .

An i've been on science site as well as gathering info from plales this stuff has been used for thousands of year's with no problem for a multitude of things? And when i woke up i felt FRESH!! not oh! God! but a LOT better. And the runs have stopped so i'm going to drop  more Drugs off today but i'm not sure 10mg or 5mg? OH!  and after going 8 hrs and not thinking about my next pill? AND i still had 2 doses to take?????