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Haven't felt myself in 5 years

Jun 23, 2014 - 0 comments

Ok so I'm Alex I'm 21, I'm writing because I really don't know what else to do. When I was 16 I smoked marihuana a couple times to try it. It didn't really make me feel any different, then I smoked one more time and had what I think was a really bad trip, it was possible the worst moment of my life. So after the trip I kinda went back to normal then a couple days later I started to get really weird symptoms. They ranged from pressure around my eyes, tiredness and some anxiety. So roughly a couple months go by and I was playing in a hockey game and I got hit the wrong way, my parents thought I had a concussion so we went to doctors he said I did. Then my symptoms just kept deteriorating and getting worse. They got so bad that I missed part of my 10th grade year and all of junior year being home schooled. The symptoms at this point were difficulty walking, thinking, speaking, cloudiness in my head, headaches, terrible headaches, pain and weakness all over, panic attacks, head rushes weird sensations in my head and face. Countless symptoms basically too many to say. But anyway at the end of junior year I got put on 20 mg of lexapro for panic, that didn't help, couldn't come outta the house for 6 month period. After lexapro we tried Zoloft and abilify which made everything worse. Started me on 60 mg of cymbalta which totally turned my life around I got out was basically a normal kid, I got to go to my senior year not 100% but I was ok. I even played hockey again for a period of time. Try to some this up, it's been three years since then I'm down to 20 mg of cymbalta my livers a little whacked from the Advil from the headaches and stuff, I've seen countless doctors and specialist. 3 neurologists, 5 different primary doctors, cardiologist, endless doctors, and they all either don't have the time to focus on me and or just really don't know what's wrong. Im about 50% right now I work full time and everyday is just a struggle. I just really want to be my old self. I feel like I've never been the same since that day I smoked pot. Please help me out.