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Who we REALLY are :)

Jul 30, 2014 - 20 comments

So I know the groups we are in are for TTC but that's not who we we are... Every time I come on here it seems we are so consumed to achieve this miracle we are losing ourselves in the process. I was once there, I get it but my only advice is to never lose who we are as women. So I'm writing this for people to write out who they are, who they REALLY are.... Try to remember who we were before this heart breaking journey or who we are away from this site. I see so much sadness and grief, if for just a moment lets remember what it's like to be HAPPY :)

I will start!! My Name is Kellie, I am 38 3/4 (eek!!) years old... Born in Winnipeg MB but moved to Calgary AB when I was 5 and lived here the rest of my life. True blood Canadian and LOVE it! I'm a stay at home mom as I have a son with "invisible disabilities" and a toddler... Married for 10years this year. I have had the honor of meeting or getting to personally know a number of you on this site, away from this site...  My girlfriends and I have a wine club where we meet once a month at someone's house who has decided the theme  and sample wines ( really it's just an excuse to get with the girls and drink... LOL). I am an old soul.... I can veggies, make jams and preserves, sew, bake and cook and love it. When I get stressed I paint, not art but my house, ;) I'm mostly a home body but I love my house so it doesn't bother me... Ok GOOOOOO!!!!!

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by retta483, Jul 30, 2014
My name is Loretta ~  im 39  40 this April. Born in Long Beach Ca . I'm Married 20 yrs this April . I have seven kids that were very hard to have Sadie 18 Shane 10 Mason 9 Elijah 8 Christian 6 Caden 4 Khloe 4 months . Im a only child . Im a stay at home mom. I home school threw Julian Charter School. I love to read and cook. other than my med help friends all my friends live out of state so I face book a lot. we have 4 Chihuahuas and 2 cats . I don't like to drive  in crowded places. I hate peas lol .

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by Dolphin05, Jul 30, 2014
My name is Lisa im 26,almost 27, born in orange, ca. Ive been with my "husband" for almost 5yrs. Im a  mother to 4 wonderful children, george 10, Myckael 7, payton 2 1/2, and William 1. My oldest two are from previous relationship and younger 2 are dh's. My oldest two also have "invisible disabilities" that require constant care, so im a stay at home mom. All my friends live far so vBulletin i enjoy online yard sale and couponing.

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by butterflybabies, Jul 30, 2014
My name is Lily I'm 39 will be 40 in dec! Agh! I have 2yr old identical twin boys who are my world! I used to be a corporate travel agent but got laid off but worked out great at the time cause we worked on trying to have kids. I was a sahm but decided to go back and finish my degree in nursing as I love to help people. Want to specialize in nicu or reproductive health. I knew my dh for 3 weeks when we got engaged and 2 months when we got married. We've been married now for 14 1/2yrs! I'm easy going, love to laugh and love my family and friends!

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by Risa615, Jul 30, 2014
My name is Marisa, I am 45!  Born and raised in San Jose, CA (Silicon Valley where are the tech companies are, such as Apple, HP, etc)  I am a high school Math teacher who is currently the president of a teachers union with 1200 teachers, so I do not teach while being president.  I got married at 38 and finally got my first bfp at 43. It was a natural conception after many failed treatment cycles. My son, Hunter, is my miracle baby, born at 27 weeks (2 pounds 14 0z) needing open heart surgery.  His surgery was a success and he is now 1 years old. He has down syndrome, but he is not going to let that stop him from doing many great things! He loves everyone he meets and brings joy to my day!  I love taking pictures and have lots of family that live nearby.  I like to travel, and visit family and friends while I am in their town.  

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by krichar, Jul 30, 2014
Thanks so much for sharing ladies :) so nice to "meet" you all, LOL!!

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by Godisfaithful, Jul 30, 2014
Hi; First I want to say thank you for posting this. I was just talking to another group of women who desire babies. I was discouraged because another period. Then I started praying to God and telling Him I miss who I was. I miss having fun and relaxing. I was too consumed about getting pregnant. But after much thinking I decided to not focus on it. It will happen. But I needed to regain who I am.

My name is Veronica. I've been married 23 years (24 this September). We have 2 grown boys and 4 grand-children (almost 5 - DIL currently pregnant). I am a Christian who loves the Lord. I am a stay at home grand-mother - lol. I baby sit them while my son and his wife work. I'm an ex soldier. My husband retired from the army. I currently enjoy DIY, mostly building furniture.

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by plumber43, Jul 31, 2014
My name is Melanie, I'm 48 without all of you I couldn't have gone through this painful but inevitably joyous journey! I love you all for that!
I am a Master Plumber worked 30 years at it and I'm damn good! I have been married for 10 years with DH for 13 he's my best friend he makes me laugh.  I have 5 children, Linda is 25, Daniel is 23 Amanda is 18, Ella is 23 months and Sophia is 7 weeks I am a grandma to Jonah 9 months. I run a commercial/residential plumbing company, I'm the first female president of the Rhode island plumbing and mechanical inspectors Assoc. I love them!!!! I love what I do! I wish I had a bunch of girlfriends I could have a wine club with!  I'm currently a SAHM, I'm not good at it with 2 under 2 ugh!!! I do try though. I work from home In between nap time and crazy breast feeding. The journey to motherhood as an "AMA Mom" was heart breaking we went through so much! The decision to do donor eggs was a hard one but  I'm so glad we did! Bio had no meaning in our house! I look at my precocious little Ella and see my soul in her eyes! I think she looks like me!  I love diamonds and power tools, DH cooks everyday and cleans, I don't give him enough credit for how well he takes care of us! I love to crochet, having my nails done and anything home improvement, DIY or reality tv( minus honey boo boo or kardashian )  AMA=old moms

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by heather727, Jul 31, 2014
My name is Heather and I'll be 37 in November. I'm currently 38 weeks pregnant with baby #3. I have a 7 1/2 year old boy and an almost 2 year old girl. Although this baby was a 'surprise' I wouldn't change it for the world! I currently work in the Marketing department of an insurance company. But my real passions are calligraphy and painting. I do wedding invitations and wall murals on the side. I'm also a 5th degree black belt - however, I recently retired given my obligations at home with the kids and still working full time (urg!). My DH is still running the karate school we opened together about 7 years ago. He and I have been together for over 18 years, married for 11 of those. We've had our ups and downs over the years but this past year we have really taken the time to make sure our relationship is first. Without each other, there is no family. :)

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by Sheaby, Jul 31, 2014
Hey yall :)  My name is Shea, and I just turned 30 in May.  I've been with my DH for almost 3 years (in October) and we recently got married on 4/27/14.  After several losses, we brought our rainbow baby into the world on 6/18.  She is our first, and hopefully not our last!!  I've been in sales my whole life, and even though I'm fantastic at it, I hate it.  So, for now I am a SAHM but also going back to school part time for the fall semester and full time starting in the spring to finish my degree and become a high school English teacher.  I love to read and write, I have a terrible shopping addiction, I love concerts and music - especially classic rock and country.  DH is my best friend, my rock, and part of what makes me who I am today.  He has truly made me a better person.  Now that I've had Kathryn, I'm going to try really hard to get back into fitness and be in the best shape of my life so I can teach her to be healthy as well.

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by Moma_Cher, Aug 02, 2014
Hi it's me! You all know me as cher but I really go by Cheri. I'm 44 years old and boy is 44 different than 40! I won't go into children status since you already know that part...
I'm sort of a hippy at heart but have a strong conservative streak in me as well. I think we call that a libertarian! I enjoy going to outdoor concerts and festivals especially local free ones ;-). I LOVE Thai food and good wine. My husband and I will celebrate 16 years of marriage this year! Sometimes I think I'm crazy for this ttc journey and being pregnant at my age!!!! I have a lot of friends that I've known since elementary school. When I become friends with someone it's usually for life! I am a Taurus and love gardening. I love people in general and have always had a nurturing spirit about me until the last 2 years I'd say... Going through so many heartaches with ttc really dampened my spirit and changed me into a bitter person who I didn't like anymore. Now that I find myself in wish fulfillment mode, I sort of wonder if I can go back to who I was?? I really hope so! I think I'll end up somewhere new... Not the same, but hopefully better not bitter.

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by MeYeah, Aug 02, 2014
Hi! I go by Ash on this site which i go by in life about 50% of the time. It's really my middle name. I am 34 and have one son (2 years old) and will only have the one unless by some weird events we accidentally get pregnant again. I def. don't want more. I feel he was and is my miracle child.

I am married to the most wonderful man whom I met online over 6 years ago and have been married for 4.

Besides my Family, my biggest Love and passion is music. I have been to over 500 shows and concerts. 1 band alone I've seen 102 times, 3 bands 50+ times, and 5 bands 20-40 times along with countless bands anywhere from once to several times. However, I have severe anxiety and on most days it's a real struggle for me to get up and out of the house. I get panic attacks about it. More times than I can Count I've canceled plans (usually plans that don't count on me to be there) just because I can't seem to force myself to leave the house. I make plans with people in advance because it's the only way I would leave my home. Once I am out I love being out. It's the process of leaving that is my issue. I hate this about myself.

I am what I consider half introverted half extroverted. When comfortable in my situation I am quite outgoing but I am very shy and when meeting new people or new situations.

I make a terrible housewife but am an awesome mom. My house needs serious cleaning... SERIOUS CLEANING. I just can't take the time to do it when My little boy wants me to play with him all day. My husband cooks dinner about 90% of the time we don't do take out. It wasn't like this before having Xander. I used to clean and cook all the time. Now the baby needs me. ha

This is my confession about who I am aside from this site...

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by Des_a_rae, Aug 03, 2014
Well hello!!!  I'm Desarae and 35 (blah) years old.  I married my best friend, BESTEST friend!!!  on July 16th 1999.  Some say I married young at only 20 years old but when you know, you just know.   I've helped my dad with his small family business of Septic Tank installation and repair since 1995.  I've helped with the "books" part but most of the time it's the laboring part.  Shovel, rock ditches, plumbing you name it, I did it.   Everyone always asks "why do you do that nasty work??"  Well it's not like I bathe in it and it's somewhere new everyday.  I LOVE being outdoors so I helped him. :)  I love mowing grass, gardening and anything outside. My dad has always planted a HUGE garden.. you name it and we grow it.  We can everything possible and it's nothing unusual to can 54 quart jars of vegetable soup in one day.    I don't do to shabby on house work but I'll make an excuse any day to do something outside rather than inside lol.   Over the years we've been blessed with 7 furbabies.  Sadie (passed away in 2010 )  Boogie (passed away in 2012)  Ginger who is 14, Biggen is 13 our baby Sophie who is 1 1/2 years old and recently we inherited 2 other babies who I have no idea of their ages,  Shorty and Smiley.  :)   Love love loveeee animals.  They've always held a special place in my heart and it don't matter if it's my animal, a stray or even yours..I love em' all.  :D   I get teased from my family that I should work for PETA.  I'm constantly saving turtles out of the road.  I mean c'mon...  they're slow!!! and could use a little help :)   I say people help people all the time...animals need someone to care for them.

I LOVE to make people laugh and love laughing myself.  I do crack myself up from time to time.  I love my family and as Ash said..I also have anxiety.  I panic around crowds and just people in general.  This is the main reason I work with my dad.  

Wonderful journal Krichar!!!  :)  

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by KeeLolo, Aug 03, 2014
Hi everyone.... I'm Yolanda, I just turned 35 in June. I am happily married to my high school friend, and now my BEST friend. He wanted to date me when we were only in the 7th grade.... He was very persistent and never gave up and here were are married 14yrs strong!!!! I am a Merchandise Supervisor at Walmart over Electronics, toy, photo lab and connection center. I've been there 7yrs.

We have suffered 2 losses are a currently TTC. I love children, I have 2 living nieces (RIP Mahogany) and 2nephews. I'm a real down to earth person who just likes to have fun, enjoys life and LOVES her family...We have a 7yr old pit bull by the name of Precious.

Ppl at work say I'm always cutting up and making ppl laugh. (Which I do)

I love catering to my hubby and taking care of him he's such a hard worker, so that makes it easy. I love also spending time with my siblings too we have awesome relationships!

My hobbies are make up & hair (weave) some say it's my obsession, lol..... I think it maybe, because I ordered some and the lady is bringing it today, lmbo!!!  I think that about all there is that I can think of to put in this lil intro :-)

I am so gracious for the opportunity to have met all of u lovely ladies.... You all have helped me through so really tough times.


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by krichar, Aug 03, 2014
Thanks everyone for sharing... It so nice to get to "know" people we have shared so many personal things with.... We've shared heartaches and personal details of our intimate lives, but never really know eachother.... I'm really happy I wept this journal, it's a way to see the person behind the struggles and heartache and see what keeps th going :)

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by Carly1306, Aug 04, 2014
Loving this idea Kelly!

I'm Carly and I'm 24 years old (I'm like the baby of the group!) I have been with my lovely other half for 5 years now.
As many of you know, we tried for a while and successfully fell pregnant back in early 2012. However, it ended in miscarriage. Since then, we decided it was a sign to wait and enjoy ourselves for a few more years.

Myself and DF have recently got our careers in a good place. We have a lovely apartment that we painstakingly decorated and made our own. We are loving life at the moment. I love to cook, clean, travel and I also love the odd wine or cocktail (those who follow me on Instagram will already have guessed that). I also have an amazing group of close friends that I talk to every day and we all get together at least once a month and chat absolute rubbish for several hours. I'm so lucky to have such great friends.

DF is 4 years older than me and will be 28 this month. We've had our ups and downs over the years but have become so much more stronger because of it. We've made some big decisions recently about our future. DF wants a baby NOW haha. But, I've said to wait. So we plan to get married next Autumn. We also plan to take all birth control out of the equation and begin on that journey again next Summer. DFs biological clock is ticking and he'd like to have a baby before he's 30 - he's such a woman!!

Oh, we also have a furbaby kitty called Marley, who is 3 years old now. He currently resides with my mum and her other cat for company.

Anyway  - I'm Carly and I like cocktails, wine and cats!

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by krichar, Aug 04, 2014
LMAO Carly (the last line)

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by mandaszoo, Aug 07, 2014
My name is Amanda. I was very blessed to have my 3 grown up kids very young after my first born Sophie died of heart defects age 5 months old. Being a mum is my favourite thing but am a chef for a living. My ex and I owned our own country inn but he left and I had to sell the business to pay him off.   7 years ago I met my love, my soul mate and my best friend Martin. He is a mechanic which is very handy by the way He has no children of his own so we have ttc . we could only afford one IVF with D egg which did not work.We felt heartbroken because we long to a family together.My kids love him too and now we are in the process of adopting. Pretty intensive but we are well on our way to going to panel. We are so excited.   I love inviting all the family and friends round for huge roast dinners or sometimes we hire the village hall and hire a band then I will make Mexican food / and we will dance the night away and enjoy a wine or two or three!!. I would love a wine tasting night Kelly but my friends are scattered all over the place and we live in the country, No public transport or even taxis to carry us home. I love reading, creative writing and painting and sketching. I love all animals and have gathered a menagerie of dogs a cat, ducks and chickens . I love long walks across the hills where I live . I love going to festivals such as Glastonbury and  visiting different countries . My favorites are Italy, Greece, Croatia France and one day I am going to visit a very special MH friend in Oregon. Great idea Kelly. Will message you very soon xx OH and I am 48 this month but still feel young at heart

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by journey2motherhood, Aug 07, 2014
This was a great idea Kellie! I'm glad I know your actual name now :-)

My name is Joann, I'm 48 years old and I have twin boys who are 27 months old.  One of my boys has "invisible disabilities" and we work hard everyday to help him get through it.  My other son is just hard to handle these days, as he is apparently the "king" of the house but forgot to tell everyone else.  I married at 42 to my best friend who I met when we worked together, he was my supervisor lol.  We dated for 10 years and no one in my family ever really thought we would get married.  At times I didn't think so either lol but it all turned out great, we are celebrating our 6th wedding anniversary in September.  It took us 3 and a half years to get pregnant, but with the help of a donor egg and IVF, we finally got our wish came true times two.  I work from home part time as a chat operator for a local college and I'm currently finishing up my English degree.  I have six more classes and I finally graduate!! YAY! If I do say so myself.  The hardest thing for me to get through is the recent lost of my mom.  My mom died on December 27th 2013 of stage 4 uterine cancer.  She was diagnosed 6 months after my boys were born and she was so happy she finally had grandchildren.  I miss her so much every day and I wish I can say its getting easier as time goes by but right now I would have to say time is not healing a dam thing.  But I have a great dad, wonderful sister and brother in law who are always there for me and my boys.  I have a chocolate lab named Maggie and an Amazon gray parrot named Nikki.  Nikki talks way too much for me, she makes me nuts lol.  I was recently reunited with my best friend from high school and I'm so happy to have found her after all this time.  I love to read, I'm a freelance writer, I have an obsession with makeup and mindless reality tv (not the Kardashians or boo boo either lol)  I love all of the women I've met here on medhelp.  They kept me going thru ttc, and to this day I know I can count on them all.  :-)

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by pb95, Sep 20, 2014
I missed this because I was on vacation, so I hope some still get to see my input and know I have enjoyed reading yours.  My name is Patty, and I regretfully turn 40 at the end of this year.  My sweet loves are my son who is 11, and my daughter who is 8.  Were hoping for the third to complete the mix, but only had miscarriage (one at 18 weeks, another at 6 weeks) and now we are moving on although i quietly do hope it will still happen.  I am a teacher, and right now have a grade 2 french homeroom which I really like.  I have always thought of myself as a strong person, but these last five years has really worn me down.  I am hoping to get back what TTC has taken away from me and rid the anxiety I sometimes get.  I love traveling and have been many cool places.  Iceland, Turkey and New Zealand are among the coolest.  My profile photo is my doggie who passed away 3 years ago, and my new doggie is almost one.  I come on here all the time and although I may not always post, I read so much of what you all write.  I'm inspired by your stories and wish the best for you all.

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by pb95, Sep 20, 2014
Oh... and married for 16 years to an awesome guy and live in Canada!

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