Remember the girl I was gonna adopt....Theres more to story...

Okay remember this story about my cousin that has issues    "read below"   !!!!!!!   I JUST FOUND OUT SHE IS PREGNANT AGAIN!!!!!!!   LORD HOLD MY MULE........I HAVE MY FAITH AND I AM WAITING ON THE LORD TO BLESS ME WITH A BABY.................I JUST DONT GET HOW HER BUTT ALREADY HAVE 4 KIDS THAT SHE THREW AWAY AND ALL ARE NORMAL WITH NOOOOOOOO HEALTH ISSUES AND WAS ON DRUGS "BAD DRUGS" WITH ALL OF THEM......(LITTLE OLE ME AND HUBBY WANT TO BE PARENTS AND I HAVE ONE TUBE THAT GOD IS REPAIRING AND WE HAVE A 3BEDROOM HOUSE, FENCED IN YARD, GOOD JOBS, EDUCATION, NEVER DID DRUGS.....AND SHE GETS TO KEEEEEEEEEP HAVING CHILDREN)    okay I  am not mad I just had to vent!!

ps we are only 6months apart we both are 26 this year and we were raised together and was close until the drugs...................but same age different living styles...and she has 4 beautiful children and here comes number 5......I think ima adopt this one though.....maybe this is what God has 4 me a newborn!! I just pray that this one is healthy as well despite their stupid mom!!

Okay my cousin that is 26yrs old has 4children......She has been in and out of prison and on drugs and keeps having babies that she cannot afford.....I was gonna get her oldest girl from her about 3yrs ago but she so called straightened up and I didnt bother....All of a sudden this weekend she calls CPS and tells them that she doesnt want her kids anymore and that she doesnt want any of the family to have them.  I was so heart broken..2 kids belong to one dad and 2 kids belong to another one.  So the oldest two kids are 5 and 7 and the youngest are 3 and 2.  The oldest 2 are with my uncle (thier grandpa)  which he is not physically able to support both of them and the youngest 2 are with thier dad's side of the family and their dad's mama (thier grandmother) is taking care of them since the dad is on drugs too....................  So now My husband and I have only been married for 1month now and I mean we have the means to take care of one but not more than that.....We have good jobs, 3bedroom house and a large fenced in front/back yard for her to play in...but my concern is ...am I ready to give up my freedom to make sure at least one of the kids arent in the generational curse of drugs and prison and have a healthy loving life.........I find myself being very selfish......because I have a year and a half left of skool and hubby and I dont have anykids.........but at the same time.......I use to pray for children and I used to pray that I got custody of the oldest...now that my prayer was answered..Medhelp what do I do.....................I want to do what God wants me to do ............And Im not sure if I should get her and raise her or should I just pick her up everynow and then and spend a lil time with her............When my DH heared about this his first reaction was ........"baby do you want to get her" and I was kinda shock at how fast he asked me if I wanted to get her.........so We are just boggled............ps my mama and I are gonna take her shopping on Sunday to get all her skool clothes.......I need all the opinions and all the prayer I can get!!!!!!!!