Sep 16, 2014
Less than a month!
I cannot believe that the time is almost here.
I am almost sad due to the fact that he won't be in my little tummy anymore. I won't be able to feel him I won't be able to see him kick me. We won't be tied to each other. Literally tied. But an upside to this sadness is I get to hold him. I get to see his chubby chubby little face. Touch his hair all his hair. Cause this baby has a lot! <3
Knowing this is our last baby I want to cherish every bit there is. This is one of the reasons I am choosing natural birth. I want to have an amazing, hard, sad, happy any and all feelings there is possible while giving birth to our baby. our last boy our last of the kids we will ever have.
I am happy to have this baby in my arms. I am as ready as I've ever been with my other boys. There is nothing that can keep me from not wanting to have this baby. From our first baby that we did not have to our first planned baby to our twin miscarriage that turned into my first scare of a tumor that could have possibly been cancer to our second healthy baby boy to now our third last baby so much has changed for our family. I would have never pictured my life to be this way. My life is beyond perfect for me that I couldn't have imagined anyway better than this six years after meeting my then boyfriend we would be here. happy, still together raising happy healthy children. We beat the statistics of being young teen parents. Not that it was a big goal of ours to prove others wrong but the fact that we did is amazing. Being 18 and 21 at the time we got pregnant not married seemed so long ago. Then it felt as if we weren't going to make things work. And believe me it almost didn't we hit rock bottom of our relationship after our son was born. During our rock bottom things couldn't have been worse our house we were renting out turned out to be getting sold at an auction due to non mortgage payments. So, there we were rock bottom, newborn and no where to live. I found a home in the desert for my son and I. And my bf and I met up and it was either we not make things work and my son and I move out of the city. We almost didn't end up going down the same path. Both of us being young, stubborn and naive to stop the stubbornness. But, we stopped the arguing, bickering, stubbornness. We made up and moved. Raised our son and when he was 6 months we married. We thought no way we wanted another baby. We played with the idea. Then 2 years later.. Here's our second boy. <3
Now, only a year and a few months here we go again on the journey to being new parents again. Except, we've learned a lot through out the years. We know what to expect.. We aren't young as we were. We now know running away, arguing over the little things and family won't drive us a part. We've grown from our mistakes our stubbornness. problems that people 10 years 20 years older than us have we've overcome because of our children, our boys. They aren't the only reasons we've stayed together through the years although they would be the best reasons to they aren't. It's genuine, strong, everlasting love that makes us stay together. And this, I believe, Is the reason our boys are so happy because they see us being happy almost everyday throughout the day <3