Sep 18, 2009
To my Family & Friends, thank you for the out pouring of love. The past couple of years have been extremely stressful for both of us. And it finally blew up in both of our faces. I don't sit around all day looking for sympathy just need to talk. As most of you know my hubby is my life and I am his. And yes he said some very hurtful things to me and he mean't them. I am still trying to digest what was said from both of us. I think we are going to weather through this storm. We have been through many, just not anything like my health issues. By the way hubby's test yesterday went well, he has an esophageal spasms, He needs to go to our Dr. for a follow and see if there is any treatment for it. He realized that he said things were not true. He came home from work yesterday and when he saw me went into sobbing. I said why are you crying? He was truly afraid I would of committed suicide. And he had reason to worry. I kept thinking about my life. And alot of negative things out weighed the positive. I totally had a mental meltdown yesterday as most of you know. I did go to see an emergency Social Worker yesterday evening. It helped some. But yesterday and today I am so sick, I have no energy left. I am shaky and can barely get around our little home. My IBS has risen it angry head all week. I can't eat, I am trying to drink as much water and green tea. My Fibro. is the worst flare I have ever experienced. I can't shake the migraine. I want to take a shower, but I just don't have the energy. I hate the way I am feeling physically and I can't do anything to make it settle down.It hurts a little when I breath, but it feels like the pleurisy I have had a couple of times. I have emailed my DR. I just wanted to let you the latest, and that I am safe. Just so tired, I can't think or solve anything my mind is had enough for awhile.
I am grateful to all of you here on MH for being there and listening. Sending me all the encouraging notes and messages. You just don't how much you have saved me from harm. If I did not have all of you checking on me and we keep talking I would be so lonely. I don't have any friends here. So you all are it:) I am going to lay down for a while. I am home and safe, just a big emotional mess and in more pain than I have ever had from Fibo. with all the symptoms beating me up. Thank you for letting me talk.
Love & hugs to all of you, you are stuck with still:)