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Not Pregnant.. I guess?

Oct 04, 2009 - 6 comments
Tags:

Not pregnant

,

relieved

,

disappointed



Okay, so, as some of you know, I was experiencing pregnancy-like symptoms earlier this month, including spotting (which I thought was implantation bleeding). I took some tests early on that came out negative, but I was waiting to be actually late to take another test.

So, here I am, "late." I still haven't gotten it, but I took a pregnancy test in the morning that came out negative. I'm thinking that spotting I got might have been my period 1 1/2 earlier. I guess it would have to be, since I still haven't gotten it and the test came out negative.

I wanna say.. I was not "TRYING" to get pregnant by any means, nor do I particularly want to become pregnant now.. But like.. It's hard to explain, even though I'm young and all, after you wait so many weeks thinking you might be pregnant, you almost want it to come out positive.. Like, when I saw the negative it was like relieved/disappointment. I don't know how to describe it.. It's just, I'm in a better situation than most of my family in when they had children. And now that I have a stable job, as does my significant other, and our own apartment, KNOWING I could do it, just kind of made me want it in a way.

I don't know.. Like I said, relieved/disappointed. I mean, I'm okay though. I know there is PLENTY of time for me to have children! :P No need to rush.

I don't know. You guys are really the only ones who knew about that "pregnancy scare," lol, so this is really the only place I could post what I really felt.

Comments
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Avatar universal
by OliviaXIV, Oct 04, 2009
I know how you feel, my boyfriend and I had a scare a couple times and although I was relieved to not be pregnant (because I do not want a child, nor can I support one) I felt sort of disappointed.

Not disappointed that I wasn't pregnant, but I feel discouraged from the future. I definitely want a child some 15 years down the road, but my mom experienced infertility, and struggled for 6 years to have me. I have the same problems, polycystic ovarian syndrome, and endometriosis which basically makes me infertile for sure without any help...

So there's this glimmer of hope that I sort of want to see that says "Yes Olivia, you CAN have a baby when you're older, and since you're pregnant now we can almost guarantee that".

I don't try to get pregnant, or want to. I just want some way of reassurance that I'll be able to be a mom when I'm older, in the form of pregnancy or not.

1052305 tn?1254954576
by tinydreams22, Oct 04, 2009
Yeah, definately. My mom had a miscarriage before she had me. I don't know. That kind of scares me, because if there is anything I am 100% sure of, it's that I want to be a mother one day.

Avatar universal
by OliviaXIV, Oct 04, 2009
At least that's what I want now. Maybe my life won't be suited for it when I'm older and ready to have one, but I really want to have a family and raise a nice little contribution one day.

1052305 tn?1254954576
by tinydreams22, Oct 05, 2009
Yeah. :) I like the way you put that "a nice little contribution," lol.

Avatar universal
by zor233, Nov 25, 2009
IF U R 18YRS OLD, AS U CLAIMED 2 B U SHOULD WAIT 4 A WHILE, COZE I THINK U R 2 YOUNG 2 B'COM PREGNANT.

Avatar universal
by ashleey77, Nov 29, 2009
i'm almost in the same boat. on the 30th of november i will be 9 days late and i have multiple symptoms of pregnancy today i took a negative test, not really sure whats going on. i had a molar pregnancy about a year and a half ago and also have symptoms but not confirmed endometriosis. can anyone help?

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