Feb 23, 2015
I have been so excited for our anatomy scan next week and just realized that i am TERRIFIED!! What if I am upset when I find out the gender. What if there is something wrong with him/her. AND this marks the half way point. I am sooooo not feeling ready to have a baby.l The past 17.5 weeks have gone by so fast, I haven't even really come to realize that I am really pregnant. (We planned it and I am thrilled but I'm not showing and I don't feel baby very often/much so it's still hard to believe sometimes). Once we know the gender we will start putting the nursery together and planning a baby shower and buying stuff and calling it by its name. It will be real. i am not prepared for this! Part of me thinks that if I don't find out the gender, it will just wait until I am ready. I know I will never be ready though. I am just so scared. I am 20 years old and I have been married for just over a year. And I am going to be responsible for this little life. To raise it to be good and help it survive. To make sacrifices (like sleep) that are so hard, just to make this little thing happy.I know I will love this baby more than life itself but it's hard to feel that right now above all of the fear and anxiety I started feeling... all of the sudden.