Jul 01, 2008
So I'm going to write down this entry now, because I'm sure if AF shows on time, I won't feel like saying anything nice :) I am 14DPO and CD30. 30 days is the longest my cycle has ever been... it's long this month I'm sure because of the 100mg Clomid I'm taking. AF usually shows on CD14... I don't think she's ever been later than that. This past week I almost got sick to my stomach twice... had to run to the bathroom and once just laid on the floor for about 15 minutes waiting for it to pass. Have I felt sick other than that? Either I've had a few stomach aches here and there or my mind is really playing tricks on me, which I'm sure is the case. Jogging on my treadmill yesterday I noticed how sore my bbs were... which is usually a pretty good indicator that AF will be here the next day. So I'm torn and going back and forth... is AF gonna show today? Or do I actually have a chance of being pregnant?? My emotions are just all over the place. I want this so bad right now... but I've told myself that my chances of being pg are low and not to hope too much. So I'm trying not to! My sister is getting married March 21 next year. If I was pregnant right now, I would be due on the 10th of March, which would be great. If I'm not, I think I will take a break next month, because I'm her maid of honor and don't want to be 9 months pg when she gets married... but I can't even imagine not trying next month! Like I said, my emotions are just going crazy!! I keep imagining going to this party my aunt has every year for the 4th and having people asking me why I'm not drinking... and saying "because I'm pregnant!!" - I can't even imagine!! Of course, I probably wouldn't tell them all yet until I knew for sure... but wow... yeah, I'm really getting my hopes up. If I wasn't pg this month, why did I have to get sick? It just makes the letdown that much worse. Please pray for me everyone! I've been trying for over 3 years now, I think my turn is up... :)
And to do my part... I promise if AF shows, I WILL NOT go crazy.. :) I'll just deal with it...