Jan 27, 2010
Tomorrow morning I go for a Neuclear Heart Stress Test... and I am sooooooooo terrified...not of the test itself, but of the results. Everytime I go for tests, I always get awful results. Now that its involving the heart, It spooks me.
I am driving myself nuts, always thinking the worst. I always tell my friends to think positive....but everytime I think Positive... the test results come back Positive. I know I'm a rambling goof right now, but my thoughts are so scattered.
I've got meself in such a state of anxiety right now... its causing my throat to hurt, that stupid globus whatchamacallit. Cant think straight.
And to think I have to wait until the 25th of February to get the results.
But I'm spooked that they are gonna find somethin wrong tomorrow. Oh gosh.
Another night of no sleeping.
I hate when I work meself up like this. Drives me nuts nuts NUTS....
I just want to have a normal life, not this crappy health I deal with every single minute.
I need a vacation.... get away from it all... if only I could leave the health woes behind... if only
ok, gonna log off, try to occupy my mind, read a book. stare at the ceiling.
Goodnight to all