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A Page in the Night

Sep 09, 2015 - 0 comments

I woke up at 3 am unable to sleep. I know it was because of things I said to him, but I had to. I couldn't let it go how he was to me yesterday because of his son. In plain words I told him, "your son doesn't want you to date me."  I wanted to say maybe we should just get on with our lives, but I didn't because in so many ways, I didn't want to give him up.  I don't want to give him up one day and the next, I do..and yet I fantasize about being able to meet someone which I don't have this out of control son to put up with it. Its just crazy..how our labor day turned out because the kid was playing him again. He twists him every way possible because he was with me, and therefore destroyed our whole day.  I had told him I just don't get this, I took your son in my home when he couldn't stand his mother, was nice to  him, cooked for him, brought him home desserts for week, he makes up vicious lies about me (that I am drinking all day and before work which is a total lie) makes a pigsty of my basement, never once picked up a dish and leaves garbage and crap all over my  house..I come home to hear him badmouthing me on my deck so loud the neighbors were at the end of their driveway..and Im the bad person because I tell him to move out?? I said what is wrong with this picture?? And my BF just looks at the ground says your right. Thats it. I keep telling myself to let it go, but I can't. I have to let it go, because bf kid moved in, I was completely fine health wise. Now I have A-FIB and high blood pressure because of this situation. I know i have to put myself first..I need to think of my health.

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