I haven't journaled because I have been so busy. I can't believe how busy we were yesterday at the station. I also went to the gym yesterday and worked out for about an hour or more. I have been working on my book (30 Days to Change your Life). I missed two days, but I am going to work on Day 8 today. I am not going to beat myself up for not doing it or updating my journal because I think it is important to remember that sometimes life throws us curves and we just have to go with it. I knew that I would catch up as soon as I got a breather.
I feel a whole lot better about somethings, especially my thoughts. I learned day before yesterday that I "lie" to myself. Assume a lot things. Example: I was in a horrible mood the other day because I thought a co-worker had betrayed me by talking negative about me behind my back. When I asked myself "Is that really true or am I making it up?" I couldn't find any evidence to support my thoughts about it. So I started applying that theory to all my initial thoughts (which are the catalyst for my reactions I discovered). If I just ask that question to every negative thought that I have, it seems to take the "whomp" out of them. I don't react! I think that is a HUGE step for me. In fact, in the last two days I have been rather peaceful inside! Now don't get me wrong, I still have those negative thoughts pop up all the time, I just ask that question immediately! I can't believe how well this works! I look back in my past and see where my thoughts actually lied to me so many times and how I believed them without question. I wonder if I had employed this theory at a younger age how different my life would have been! I wonder if everyone employed this theory how different the world would be.
I am looking forward to this day. I signed up for a fitness trainer yesterday, I am start on Monday. He manages the gym where we go work out on shift. (PT is mandatory in the fire department) I also contacted a nutritionist and hopefully will schedule an appointment with her soon.
I have had many times over the last two days to also use the plan I developed for not overscheduling myself and being honest about what I did and can do! I must say that it has been a success. It is really, no doubt, a self-esteem booster! I like it very much. (see march 21st journal entry).
I am glad I am me!
My Moods 2010