Feb 18, 2016
Well its here; Tomorrow is the day where the Year 12s get introduced to the school one by one at a whole school assembly. I've been looking forward to this for so long, but even so, it doesn't feel real yet. And it probably wont be until i have to walk up and recieve my badge as they call my name.
Its that question of; Do I really deserve this? Have I earned it? Have I worked hard enough? Have I achieved enough? DO I REALLY DESERVE THIS?!
I refuse to answer it because I know the answer I'll give. But tomorrow, as the moment comes, I will force any negative thought to leave. I dont want it. I dont want to ruin this experience for myself. Even if I temporarily am proud of myself, just until its over.. I just dont want it to be a negative memory, I want it to be amazing. For those moments, I will say to myself; I do deserve this. I do. I have achieved so much, and I'm allowed to be proud of myself, even just for now- this moment.
This is going to be my moment. Its important. And if i ruin it, I'll never forgive myself.