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Depressed and Frustrated!!!!!!!!

Jul 28, 2008 - 14 comments

I went to the doc Monday, spent $500 on the visit and lab work since I do not have insurance.  I did not have the money but instead of paying a note, I went ahead and had the tests done just to try and find out what was wrong.  EVERYTHING came back fine.....I'm normal.  So why do I not feel normal???  My pain level is through the roof, I can't sleep for days on end and when I can sleep I only sleep for a few hours and then I'm up again!  My muscles ache, my joints ache but I'm normal for everything.  Imagine that.  So now what?  I really WANT something, anything to be wrong with me at this point.  
I asked for my pain meds to be uped or give me a different kind, we'll see what he says about that.
I'm going to have to go to Charity Hospital until I can get my medicaide approved, maybe they will look a little harder into what is wrong with me!!  I'm so sick of being told everything is fine when I know there is something wrong with me.  
This is just so frustrating.  I want to go back to work but how can I?  
I have so much to do today and all I want to do is lay in the bed.  At least my oldest son is home now and can drive me.  Lord knows the last thing I need is to pass out while driving and be sued because I crashed into someone because I'm normal.

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561964 tn?1283798616
by Linda1068, Jul 28, 2008
didn't want you to think you were all alone with your symptoms. I feel like yuck as well. I just want to go back to feeling great. I hope you get the financial assistance you need to get properly taken care of.  A prayer for peace in all of this is what you need.

I lift up Melissa to you, Lord. Please help her in this time and let her know she is not alone. That you are with her. I pray for healing over her body, in the mighty name of Jesus. May your grace and mercy abound in her heart.

Don't know if you are a Christian, but I am.  so, please accept this prayer that I prayed for you. God Bless you today.

Avatar universal
by PlateletGal, Jul 28, 2008
Hi Melissa,

I know... I've been there. By chance, did you happen to check out the health pages that I created for the fibro/CFS board ? I listed the diagnostic tests that fibro & CFS patients are failing.

573338 tn?1217264054
by rose87, Jul 28, 2008
I think you should go to a health food store and get some really good whole food vitamins and make sure you are drinking purified water.  Examine your diet and what you are putting on your skin.  What are you eating off of (do not use plastic in microwave or nonstick pans)? are you getting enough fresh air?.  Do not use bug spray, fabric softener or scented candles?  See if this helps.  Maybe you are being exposed to too many chemicals or you have an allergy.

are you on any meds?
how old are you?

572021 tn?1330905654
by SupermomNC, Jul 28, 2008

This could be a long shot, but it would be easy to try.  Try eliminating wheat from your diet.  Just eat fruits, veggies, and meats, for a few days and see if you notice an improvement.  I would say give it a solid week.  If you don't feel any different then you could rule wheat out possibly.  Alot of ppl have wheat intolerance, my son is one, and it causes alot of symptoms and isn't detected unless they do a specific food intolerance test. He was 4 and having headaches, stomache aches, and back aches to name a few.  Give it a shot. Couldn't hurt.  Best wishes to you.  I hope you have answers soon I know how debilitating chronic pain can be. I suffered for several years with painful endometriosis before it was diagnosed and removed.  Just keep your chin up as best you can and try to find the silver lining in every day.  It is hard but find the one good thing in the day and focus on that and build it up and you will notice it will make a difference. Hang in there hun, you are not alone. Blessings!

Avatar universal
by kitonthemoon, Jul 28, 2008
Hi, Mellissa,

I am sooooo sorry that tests results came back disappointing.  Do you know what kind of tests was done on you?
Has doctor tested you on Candida, Hypothyroid, viral/becterial load?  rhumatoid arthritis?  Please get hold of a copy of your test results (by law, he has to give it to you) and look it over..  Miay be he is looking at the wrong direction and missed what's necessary?  Just a thought.

Yikes......girlfriend, I cannot even begin to phathom how stressed you must be right now, which in turn worsens your insomia and pain threshhold.   Like Linda, I'm also a Christian and believe in the power of prayer.  Please know I've lit a prayer candle for you and May God Bless you today and always.


460185 tn?1326077772
by lonewolf07, Jul 28, 2008
Have you been tested for Chronic Fatigue?  That term didn't come into being until relatively recently.  Even mono can make you feel so tired, not to mention external factors.

My brother is allergic to wheat.  His wife can't eat processed food - salami, etc.

Hope you are feeling better soon.  Here's a prayer and a (((((HUG))))) from Toronto


Avatar universal
by PlateletGal, Jul 28, 2008

There is hope. I'm a treatment that is even getting people who have had autoimmune diseases back to work.

Please... keep fighting.

Hugs from Arizona !

528396 tn?1217526013
by Melissa70817, Jul 29, 2008
Thanks for all of  you who commented on my journal.  

I have tried to change my diet.  I actually quit smoking, did the total juice diet for 6 months.  It did clear up my IBS but never took away my pain.  

I had much blood work.  The main thing I was wanting was the total thyroid work up.  Well, I came back normal.  I cannot remember what other blood work I had done.  

Keep your fingers crossed that my medicaide is approved.  If I'm approved I will then have the ability to not settle for this diagnosis.  I know many people go through the grieving process with FM and CFS.  I guess that might be me BUT I want to be sure.  If I can get better I want to do everything I can to do so.  Medicaide will also free up money for me to try alternative treatments because I will no longer have to pay for my office visits or meds.  

Again, thanks to all of you for your prayers and suggestions, they are greatly appreciated.


389974 tn?1331015242
by swampcritter, Jul 29, 2008
Swampy has this image of Dr House in front of his whiteboard with all of Melissa's symptoms written on it.

Questions for thought:

1. Is the lack of sleep a symptom on its own, or is it a consequence of the pain?

2. Has there been any tests that would rule out pain transport and interpretation, such as nerve damage, spinal cord, or brain issues?

3. Is a headache part of your pain? Any vision problems, like double vision, or color perception being off? Do you wear strong prescription glasses?

4. Any problems with coordination? Can you skip? Can you tell different kinds of coins apart in your hands?

5. You mentioned IBS, and how that seems to be affected by diet -- is it also affected by the season and exercise level?

528396 tn?1217526013
by Melissa70817, Jul 29, 2008
1. Lack of sleep can sometimes be due to the pain but not always

2.  I have had so much blood taken that they should start paying me for it.  I have also had MRI's and CAT scans.  I have curvature of the spine and a cyst on my right ovary.  That was all they found from that.  Blood work is fine.

3.  Yes, I do get headaches sometimes, not constant though but they have been coming more and more frequently.  I do SOMETIMES have vision problems, I sometimes feel like I have a "glaze" over my eyes.  Nothing with color perception.  I do not wear glasses

4. I'm not really coordinated.  Can I skip?  haha  I am doing good to walk.  I think if I tried to skip I would either pull something or crack something.  Yes, I can tell the different coins in my hands.

5.  No, the IBS doesn't seem to change with the seasons.  

389974 tn?1331015242
by swampcritter, Jul 29, 2008
One other question -- how long have you lived in the area where you live now? Did you grow up there?

528396 tn?1217526013
by Melissa70817, Jul 29, 2008
Yep, lived in Louisiana all of my life.  Have lived within 20 miles of where I am now all of my life.  

528396 tn?1217526013
by Melissa70817, Jul 29, 2008
I do have an update though, my doctor's nurse called this afternoon and said that I should see a neurologist per my doctor.  SOOOOOO....I guess I will have to find out if I'm approved for medicaide or go to the charity hospital here to do that.  My doctor broke me on my last visit.  

525545 tn?1293181194
by SharJ, Aug 28, 2008
I am sorry to hear you did not really get any real answers from the tests you had done. I also hope you will get the financial help you need so you can continue getting the health care you need and hopefully a doctor that can give you some answers for all your pain. I will be praying for you. I am here if you would like to talk. I know what is like not to have health care. We did not have it for about 4 years. We do now.  Good Luck Melissa.


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