Aug 19, 2010
Well, my summer is coming to an end now and I just wanted to reflect on how it's been. I've had a great summer being around all of my closest friends. Sadly, two of them have to go back to college and of course I am sad about that. They are two of the people that I feel the most comfortable around. I have gained stronger relationships with everyone that I have hung out with this summer which I am very proud of. It's so much easier being around a group of people that you trust and that you can laugh with and that you feel so comfortable around! It's been so great. Now though, it's back to reality. I have to go back to college and deal with not knowing anyone in my classes. I have to deal with trying and trying to be open to meeting new people, but failing miserably. I won't have two of my closest friends around to talk to everyday and see if they want to hangout. I have to deal with my downsized group of people who I can hang out with. I don't have very many people that I can just text or call to hangout, especially when my good friends are gone. I have a very minimal maybe two or three people to do that with. I am hoping though, as I've gained stronger relationships with some people, that I can extend this group a little more when my other good friends are gone at college. It takes me quite a while to open up to new people and feel comfortable around them. This I know about myself. I would like for it to be easier, though. I don't want to feel awkward around people all the time. I want to be myself without thinking thoughts about being awkward and quiet. I want to put past experiences behind me and start fresh. I want to feel good about myself and like I'm at the same level as everyone else. I want to stop thinking that I'm an awkward piece of ****. I need help for this. I've done a great job on my own thus far, but I think I need further help on meeting new people.