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No stress- bring it on but gently

Aug 31, 2010 - 0 comments

   I read that the Mayo clinic says 80% of all diseases have some sort of link with stress!  Wow, could that be right?  Autoimmune diseases on particular seem to be on the rise. Perhaps there is something to it, yet was there really less stress when we if we didn't have a good crop year, family members starved?

   How do you live in our present day society and not feel the effects of stress in your life and on your body? My days now are very focused on relieving stress.  I do recognize that part of everyday for me needs to be set aside to  relax, breath, and just letting it all go.  This is going to take a lot of practice b/c this is not part of my natural inclination to relax and care for myself.

  When I think about Jesus and his life He was never rushed or stressed and He always made time to spend with His Father, especially before a big event.  Thy will be done.  So if we are suppose to be like Him then why does stress and those anxious moments get to us?  Well, duh, we are human, imperfect and our faith (if we have it) is immature.  So, now that I know what I need to work on....

   I talked with a friend today who is battling stage 4 breast cancer.  She is incredible. Her long lovely locks are long gone and as she nears the end of her chemo days, she is beginning to focus on the surgery ahead of her.  We both marveled at the recent developments in medical science that have made it possible to give us a better prognosis than even 5 years ago.  Such a lucky time to be sick we joked with each other!  She told me to call anytime I need anything but not next week as that was when she was having her breasts removed.  We hooted until our stomaches hurt after she said that.  The main piece of advice she gave me was not to be shocked by the way people handled or responded to my dx.  "Don't take it personally", she said.  "The people you would have sworn would have been there until the end may disappoint you and the people you would have never expected the best from will give you everything."  Good advice, no expectations.

    I have the distinct overwhelming feeling sometimes that I am on a gigantic wave that has swepted me up and is taking me to unknown parts.  There is no frame of reference to what I am going through (and I have been through a lot in my life).  Every moment it seems I am just bobbing up and down trying to get through.  The tears really haven't come. You would think the steroids would have done me in by now.  Don't get me wrong I get those moments where I think the best reaction would be to run out into the street screaming and yelling.  Yet, each moment leads to the next and I find I am still very much present even when I really would like to check out.  Can't check out I tell myself, this is your life.  Shiver, get weepy,order the team sandwiches, enjoy the sunlight on the pool water, bake chicken for tonights dinner, random stuff that is my life, but there is no escaping each moment.  Stay with it.

   One of my children said she felt more generous in the last week than ever before. She just felt a powerful energy flowing through her that she had to share with others.  Great stuff!  The kind of stuff you think, wow, good things are coming from this.  At the school open house last night I listened to a chemistry teacher of one of my kids rememberiing how my child had described this teacher. Boring she said, everything about her was boring.  Funny, this teacher spoke comfort and security to me. She loved what she did and loved the kids she taught and wanted them to be sucessful.  There was something about her that was just so solid. When I got home I encouraged my child to look at this teacher with a new perspective.  A lot of life is based on just the way in which we look at things.

  The stress comes and goes. Sometimes I think I can handle it, like the old me could (or could she?) but often times I think, oh please I am not myself here, could things just slow down a bit and go a bit more gently?  I feel strong and weak at the same time.  Powerfully strong, lucky, blessed, loved, happy, and where I am suppose to be yet, everything is all wrong b/c I don't recognize what my life is at the moment, I don't recognize my weaknessess that now seem so obvious.  So, bring it on but gently is my new double identity.  Depending on the moment I am ready and then the next, not so much.  I have the feeling this will be my new reality for a long while to come.  

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