All Journal Entries Journals
Previous | Next

9 Years of PTSD/Anxiety

Jun 07, 2019 - 1 comments

It's been a minute. I was randomly thinking of this site last night and remembered how helpful it was when I was in the thick of my mental breakdown.

That was over 9 years ago!

At that time I was terrified, not sleeping, panicking all the time, felt like I was in a dream, was either crying or not feeling anything, couldn't see straight, couldn't function, and I couldn't even return to my apartment so I was sleeping on my parents couch. I thought my life was ruined and I would never be okay again. I searched here for a cure, because that's what I wanted. That's what I NEEDED.

But I didn't find a cure, I didn't find any easy way out of the dark or a quick fix. That was frustrating. I wanted someone to tell me I would be okay and I would be okay now. I wanted a definitive answer on when things would get better and that I would be back to my normal self again, and I just couldn't find that. I was frantic and scared and it was such an awful time.

But now that I'm over 9 years down the line, I get it. There is no cure, no quick fix, and it takes work. I am not the same person I was, and I never will be.


I'm okay. I got better and found a new normal. I can count the amount of really bad panic attacks I've had in the last few years on one hand. That seemed unfathomable back when I was drowning in them.

So I guess if you're looking for hope; it's there. You will be okay again, the world will make sense and you will find your new normal. Just hang in there.

Post a Comment
649848 tn?1534633700
by Barb135, Jun 07, 2019
I don't know you, but thank you for coming back to let people know you're doing better.

You're right that there's no cure or quick fix for anxiety, but there is help for it and I'm glad you found it.  I know there are people who will appreciate knowing there's hope and that they, too, can be okay.

Best of luck.

Post a Comment