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He's not that interested (HUGE VENT)

Sep 30, 2010 - 6 comments

Okay, so it sorta started with me having to move back from Germany (where I lived with my dad) to Holland (where I live with my mom, her husband and my brother). Since DB lives in Germany still, we would only get to see each other during weekends. Guess that's not happening either!

He lost his job about a week after I moved. I wasn't pregnant at the time, but we were ttc and both very excited about it. We could talk for ages about how he would kiss my belly goodnight every night as soon as I got pregnant. It makes me cry just to think about it, because now that it's actually happening, I don't get to see him because he comes up with reasons why he can't come down that weekend. I don't have a car or a lisence for that matter, so I can't get to him very easilly if I wanted to. His dad has taken the car because he can't afford it at the mo and spends ALL his time driving around his daughter-in-law (which is not me, obviously) and not giving DB a chance to use the car.

Anyhow, I'm a bit of a tough cookie so I can stand the waiting (last time there was 4 weeks between us seeing each other, so far it's been two, going on three since it's not happening this weekend either), but I expected us to be all happy and over each other once we got to see each other again. BIG MISTAKE. He gave me a peck on the lips, asked me how I was and marched on inside to say hi to my mom. We had a wedding thing that weekend, so barely time for each other, plus my sister's birthday on Sunday so even less time. He barely looked at or talked to me, spend the Sunday evening we did have together with his back turned to me in bed, watching TV. I could only think: why the hell is he not all over me, after 4 weeks of not seeing each other at all?? Why isn't he even looking at me?

At this time I had discovered a week or so before that I was pregnant, and I thought he'd be totally thrilled about it. At least he was on the phone, but once we went to bed to sleep, he didn't even say goodnight to me, let alone give the belly a kiss goodnight. I had been looking forward to that so much and he just jackassed his way through it. I'm just very sad about everything and don't know what to do. He said he wants to come to the first u/s but I'm not sure any more if I want him to when he's behaving like this.

:(:(:(

Preggo with numero uno
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1417451 tn?1319403098
by js522495, Sep 30, 2010
men suck! thats about all i have to say about the men topic...im having similar problems with my man...im not pregnant but he is pissing me off every time i look at him im mad at him and im pmsing HARDCORE...period due tomorrow and PMS like CRAZYYY!!! so im crying every half a second and he doesnt care and chooses to ignore me and tell me the reasons im crying are stupid...ugh! men!!!!!

soo heres the question...what do we do about it? keep loving them? or say **** it?

1417451 tn?1319403098
by js522495, Sep 30, 2010
ps..im here for you so please VENT!

Avatar universal
by patient13, Oct 01, 2010
That sounds like what happened to me. I went over to this guys house who I was in love with, and after an hour he yelled at me and said 'Just get your stuff and go!'. I kept thinking, if I was blond and looked like Pamela Anderson maybe he wouldn't have said that. That was 8 years ago and I only dated twice since. Now I'm practically on my deathbed and I'll probably die single. Just remember, if you believe in Jesus, when you get to heaven that guy will adore you and so will every other guy you ever wanted. That's what I believe. Hope you feel better.

Avatar universal
by April162010, Nov 15, 2010

I hope you are doing better by now and hopefully understand you are will be a single mother today. You need to think what are your priorities first and what would you be doing with your life and the baby.

Kids are a lot of responsality and once they are here that should be your focus.

it seems your boyfriend has not interest at this moment and may have some other interest somewhere else and as a woman we should know better. Unfortunally this things happens, you are not the first one or will be the last one.

Go on in life, work and get to know new friends, meet with single mother groups who can help you.


TO:
patient13,

sweetheart!... there is so many guys in this world! Maybe you are looking in the wrong place or dreaming of guys that are not in your reach.
I am so sure there is someone around you waiting to talk to you and you dont allow it... because maybe it doesnt fit your criteria ...

Love is in the air girl!.... you are lucky to have a life, has 2 arms, 2 legs!...enjoy life..life is only one! dont let the time go pass and then you will regret...

who cares about that guy!...he is gone...you need the one that is coming to you...

the past is the past... i have broken many hearts and many have broke mine...and finally I am happy ...this is life

you are young, nice, beautiful!...Enjoy it


875268 tn?1332768851
by iMazed, Nov 15, 2010
April, I appriciate your comment, but to say that hopefully I understand I will be a single mother one day? My boyfriend and I have had a talk since and he's actually improved a lot. He admitted to me that he had a lot of trouble getting his head around the fact that there's a baby in my belly, and the fact that we don't get to see each other a lot yet, plus his family being a bit of a mess at the moment is creating a lot of stress for him, causing him to turn inwards. I'm an open book what my emotions are concerned, but he likes to keep it to himself a lot more and I need to kick his behind pretty hard to get anything out of him. I don't think that means he's leaving me, or that I turn out to be a single mom at some point in the future. I figured out that I need to change my way of talking to him and encourage him more that get angry at him for not doing what I want him to do. We've set a date for moving in together finally, so we're creating more of a family enviroment each day.

136689 tn?1419580447
by misslollipop, Nov 15, 2010
great news that everything is getting sorted slowly.

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