Jun 01, 2011
Things are better, for the most part. I'm trying to not be so oh woe is me all the time, I think the emo thing can get annoying. I don't want to be annoying.
I went to Vegas, and it was awesome. I flew and didn't freak out once. That was huge for me. As soon as I had my first panic attack and subsequent nervous breakdown or whatever that was, one of my first thoughts was "I will never be able to fly again". I love to travel so that was a huge blow. I figured that since I couldn't walk to the mailbox, or really leave the couch, without freaking out, there was no way I'd ever get on a plane again.
But I did, and it was awesome. I can't explain how happy I am that it happened and that it went well. I've come so far in a year and a half, and I'm proud of myself.
I'm also dealing with the boy thing much better now. I can do better, and I know that. I'm done selling myself short.
Now I'm just trying to deal with money issues. It seems like my bills just keep piling up. Medical bills, credit card bills, student loans, and then my car needs to be registered as of yesterday. If only I'd hit the jackpot in Vegas.
I'm not falling apart though, which is also new. My entire life seems like it has been filled with stress. Stress over nothing usually. I was the queen of turning something tiny into something catastrophic. I'm trying to deal with life better, so I'm logically approaching this money issue and proactively dealing with it instead of falling apart and taking a nap, which is what I use to do.
So yes, things are good.