Jul 03, 2011
So Ive been reading this book called "A Visit From the Good Squad" by Jennifer Egan and I found a passage that really meant a lot to me and my struggle with depression. The character had just attempted suicide the other week and was at his friends house with some friends smoking pot. He just yelled at one of his best friends because she was complaining about a small quirk about him and he went on to say "Im sorry your moms a bigot, im sorry im an *******, im sorry i make you nervous because i tried to kill myself..." and following that comes the passage:
(this story is told in 2nd person, so the "you" is the man who tried to kill himself)
"Your throat tightens up and your eyes get wet as you watch their faces go from stony to sad, and its all kind of moving and sweet except that youre not completely there--a part of you is a few feet away, or above, thinking, Good, theyll forgive you, they wont desert you, and the question is, which one is really "you," the one saying and doing whatever it is, or the one watching?"