It's midnight and instead of sleeping I'm wide awake drinking ice water trying to get the baby to kick. He's been really still all afternoon and evening and it's driving me crazy.
In the last couple of weeks my anxiety has been building up. I went on bedrest before at 24 and 30 weeks so being at 26 weeks makes me a little nervous. I'm timing contractions all day and then counting kicks all night.
I have this feeling like something is going to go wrong. Like he's going to get wrapped up in his cord or my water will break at 30 weeks. Why am I so anxious?? I'm freaked that labor won't go right or he'll have a birth defect. Am I drinking enough water or eating the right food. Will I fail my blood sugar test again and have to do the 3 hour? Will he be in the NICU like my daughter was? My labor was so short with my last one what if it's shorter this time? I won't get my epidural.
I know if everything goes right I only have 9 to 11 weeks left. I've never gone more than 37 weeks to the day and that was with my first 13 years ago. Maybe all this is just the impending reality of a baby being here so soon.
26 weeks appointment is in two days. I plan on talking to my ob and I hope she can put my mind at ease.
Jelly Bean # 3