Jul 23, 2011
I ate some sprayed peaches that made me sick in Phoenix. At the same time, I started smelling cigarette smoke when there definitely was none... so badly that it became very distressing and actually had me holding my breath automatically! Not good. I posted to a good online Q&A site and, while everyone agreed that it was neurological, the only answer that resonated with me was from a woman whose husband had the problem during a time of great stress... His doctor asked him what about the current problem reminded him of another time when cigarette smoke was prevalent. He thought of a long ago time that could apply. So I thought about it and realized that what I was going through was very directly related to similar childhood trauma... and both my parents smoked. Now when I smell the smoke I pray for the person who was driving me crazy (I tell myself that I'm smelling the smoke because that person is thinking or talking negatively about me)... and the smell quickly departs. The brain is a "fearfully and wonderfully made" device. I am the only person I know who gets severely depressed and crazy manic-minded at the same time. Indescribable. Don't hold your breath waiting for me to say it's a fun experience. I feel like my parts are stuck together but there's no glue and it would take just a good tap to make me fly to pieces... like the "jumping cholla cactus" I saw in a video about harvesting saguero cactus fruit.