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another one of those nights...

Dec 03, 2011 - 0 comments










guess it's a good thing there's a charge on my ipod, cuz there's no way i'll be falling asleep tonight without music to keep me calm...
i dont know why it is, but always, without fail, whenever i have a good time, i crash so hard and feel as depressed as hell. if i have fun for a few hours, the rest of my night is hellish. if my whole day is good, the entire next day is murder. its like, when i'm happy, my body uses up all the good emotions and leaves all the bad for later, and with all the good used up there cant be a mix of bad and good to make just a neutral yet bearable mood....
and i didnt even have enough fun to warrant such a low mood... yeah, i hung out with my best friend at the xmas festival thing, but i've had more fun at lunch time than that. [[although, the class i have after lunch always ends with me in a pretty low mood, hence furthering my point from earlier...]]

and i have this new thing now, where my lower back just *hurts*... like i need to pop it or get up and move... its unbearable, and happens a lot during school hours.... prolly from sitting in those hard desks for so long......

egh... i dont wanna go to bed, but i need to.... why do i have the feelings that i'll be having nightmares tonight? T-T

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