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dammitall....

Jan 11, 2012 - 0 comments

and i've been feeling so good lately. i've been happier than i have been in a loooong time. why do i have to start feeling bad again? ive been on the verge of tears a lot the past two days, for no reason whatsoever. ive been really stressed out too, with school starting and so many deadlines coming up. and i've actually started doing my homework again, so i have absolutely no free time, cuz slaving over a million calculus problems takes the majority of the afternoon, and then i have other stuff to do. ugh *head/desk* i'm supposed to be happy right now, not about to cry. almost everything is going right, and i've got the sweetest guy you could ever meet as a boyfriend... i honestly dont know how i lived for so long without human contact. he hugs me, holds my hand, wraps his arm around me... ive never had something like that, and for a long time, i've *craved* physical contact... i'd appreciate the few hugs i could get from my friends so much... and even sometimes, i'd stand up on my tippie-toes and pretend to hug an imaginary guy, pretend to be held in someone's arms. i dont ever want to take being hugged, held for granted, i dont ever want to take it for granted, and forget those times when i went without something my core desired so helplessly...

i have nothing better to do now, since i cant think enough to write, so i'm going to bed.... maybe i'll get a decent night's sleep for once...

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