Apr 16, 2012
Okay- I just need to write and see if I can get this figured out.
Back story is my girls were in the NICU and Ihave never really been able to bf they are now 4 months old. In the NICU they want your breast milk but they want you to pump it so they can measure it. I have tried and tried but my babies got used to the flow of a bottle and do not have the patience to latch most of the time. If I catch them in just the right mood I can get them to bf. There was a time when this was working pretty well. So I pump a few times a day. I quit pumping over night bc my production has dropped. I am only getting a couple of bottles a day now.
SO- I need to decide what I am doing. I do not want to pay to rent the hospital pump anymore- it is $75 per month so I want to decide soon. It is time to let myself dry out? My production has dropped. It would be nice not to have to pump- there are lots of things I could be doing with that time and it is never convenient. I swear my girls have radar and the minute the pump starts they fuss!!!!! OR do I buy a pump- even if I spend $70-$130 it is still less than what I will pay in rental fees. Two of my friends used the mipump and it is only $70- they both loved it- I think I prefer the $130 Lanisol since it is a closed system. BUT if I am losing my supply is that a waste?
I know breast milk is best for the girls- I hate that I am sooooo frustrated about this. I want to do what is best for my girls. I never really thought I would go beyond 6 months with breast milk- so is stopping 2 months early okay. I feel so much guilt about wanting to stop- but my body may be stopping inspite of my wishes!
argh. Iam still just as confused as when I sat down to write this!