Nov 08, 2008
up and tired and pooped. $PM Saturday. The usualy intense nightmares, reliving the "we don't love you anymore" aspect of losing my job 13 years ago, I swear I've got PTSD from it .I dream about it almost every night and can't dream up a resolution. It's haunting me severely.
Feeding homemade dill pickled carrot strips to some man while he asks for beer.
Now the arduous task of filling 2 weeks of pill holders... 2 per day, covering about 30 prescription pills. I HATE doing it, reminds me what a total loser I am. That's not a conscious thought, but it's my suspicion that's what drives the distaste.
Also included, Multiple Vitamin, glucosamine and Vinpocetine. I want to investigate a B-complex that includes B5 because I read about it within the context of my specific symptoms. I wonder about the various DHEA drugs, also. I stopped St. John's Wort because it just is impossible to tell if it's helping or hurting.
I'm compulsively spending all my money every month and my prepaid rent and utilities fizzle out in a few months, leaving me with less per month than I spend just on necessities.
It's going to be interesting.
That's the impending horror.
On the other hand, I'm doing some investing in my health and my budget. Flaxseed goes into my green-tea smoothies.