Nov 14, 2008
Ok...im just gonna spill it. maybe i will feel better putting it all out there to so many that have helped me threw so many very tough times in my life. I am so scared! So scared! I have been in and out of the hospital, been poked at and had test after test done recently. I am going in for surgery next Friday. I thought i had a bad kidney infection and it turned out i have ovaries that are loaded with cysts. Ok i thought i can deal with that. Sure i hurt but its fixable. My doctor ran some more tests and a few days ago at my appointment she sat me down and said a test came back"high enough to raise concern" and that along with all my other syptoms shes very concerned. Concern...concern for what i thought?!?! Ovarian cancer...........omg i still am processing. Honestly after that i dont recall much else that she said. Well i ended up back in the hospital last night. The pain and other things were unbearable. I received some advice to make sure i ask for an OB oncologist and i was going to bring this up on monday at the doctors when i go in so we can discuss my surgery. Didnt have to bring it up....my doctor this morning told me she consulted with one and she is going to be there during my surgery just in case. Was this suppose to make me feel better?!? It actually scares the he** out of me. I still cant believe cancer is being used with my name. I am happy and very trusting with my doctor. She really is great and shes being very cautious. I am just so scared. I cant handle much more as far as stress goes. I am being crushed here! UGgggggg.....thanks for letting me vent.