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You know you are a nurse when:

Nov 16, 2008 - 8 comments

You know you are a nurse when:

1) you believe your patients are only alive because its illegal to kill them

2) you recognize that you cannot cure stupid

3) You own at least 3 pens with the names of prescription meds on them

4) you wash your hands BEFORE you go to the bathroom

5) you believe there is a special place in hell for the inventor of the call bell

6) you consider a tongue depressor an eating utensil

7) you have placed a bet on someones blood alcohol content

8)you have told a confused patient that your name is that of a co-worker and to call if they need help

9) your bladder can expand to the size of a winnebagos water tank

10) you believe that not all patients are annoying.. some are unconcious

11) your family refuses to watch medical sitcoms with you because you spend the entire time correcting everyone and pointing to upside down xrays

12) you swore to have do not resuscitate tattood on your chest- SOON

13) your idea of fine dining is anywhere you can sit down to eat

14) you believe in the ariel spraying of prozac

15) you believe that the goverment should require permits to reproduce

16) you believe that the unspeakable evils will befall anyone who utters the phrase "wow its quiet"

17) you want to write a book.. "suicide" getting it right the first time

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561451 tn?1257476350
by ashiepooh, Nov 16, 2008
Ahaha ok i'm not a nurse, but this made me crack up!!  LMAO

377493 tn?1356502149
by adgal, Nov 16, 2008
I'm not a nurse either, but I did once spend a Saturday evening in an Emergency Room.  After that experience, all you say makes total sense to

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by Jacqui805, Nov 16, 2008
I AM a nurse, and I'm tellin' ya that no one has a better sense of humor than me and I could relate with and laugh at, some of what was written above.

That being said however, there are several lines up there that I take GREAT exception to.  I realize of course, that this is YOUR journal, and you are allowed to write in it, whatever you want, and should be allowed to do that, but I if you seriously can relate to certain lines there, I urge you to look at why you became a nurse in the first place.  There are several people I've worked with over the years that I feel strongly should either quit the profession, or they should quit on their ain't for them.  I have been a patient, and AS a nurse, I knew how my nurses were trained and what SHOULD be expected of them, only to find that they were the most uncompassionate, unethical, unempathetic, lazy people I'd ever seen.  

This may seem really harsh to you, or to some, and someone for sure is telling me to lighten up, but I take my profession seriously.....there are so many people that shouldn't be working with people, let alone people with medical and/or mental health issues.  I CAN laugh, about alot of it, but really get peeved at the lines about the the lines 1, 5, 8 and 10 especially.  These are your CLIENTS...remember, that's how we're SUPPOSED to think of them, as that is what they ARE.  They are PAYING us for a service.  If we feel it's a nuisance to answer their call bells, no matter how often they ring, or we view the vast majority of them as annoying us, we're in the wrong field.  Lay people may not totally understand, and that's ok, but we are taught the reasons for one's behavior in our training.  We are taught, that if someone's on their call bell often for example, they may be scared, maybe they're just a demanding person, maybe they're confused....we're supposed to be empathetic and never ever make a person feel badly for requiring our service.

I was in hospitalized several times over the last 4 years, and I can't tell you how many times someone would come into a room to do a blood draw or something else the doctor ordered, only to be short-tempered, sigh the whole time, grumble, you name it, and that's really the mildest stuff I experienced.  I don't wanna hear how we're all over-worked either....We have a job, period.  IF your employer is taking advantage of you, you need to take your beef up with them, but not the patient/client.  

I write this only with the best of intentions here.  I am not trying to make this an argument....honestly.   I just have seen so many awful nurses saying some of these things in practice, and have been on the short-end of their stick as a client.  

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by hatevicodin, Nov 17, 2008
This is too funny, thanks for brightening my otherwise awful evening!

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by babyprayers, Nov 17, 2008
ok.. well I did not mean at all to offend anyone  (jacqi805) I also take my job seriously and not to yank my own chain but am an excellent. exceptional nurse. I am a very strong patient advocate and would never wish harm to my patents. I have been in the nursing field from CNA -LPN---RN since I was 16 years old.. ALL nurses are overworked, we work short handed, in some of the worst conditions, and you (jacqui) cannot tell me you have worked all your years as a nurse with never a frustrating tedious shift and  never ever felt like anythng but thrilled that your a nurse  if you have then I guess your god.. again I would never ever wish harm to my patients but there has been some,, after working 12 hours that after they have rang their call bell 30 times like they are my only patient, I too was just recently hospitalized and for the most part the staff was fantastic, there were a few that needed a new profession, anyway my journal is just that my journal, I did not ask for an opinion on why I am nurse, hope everyone enjoyed

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by GNicole, Nov 17, 2008
You gave me a good laugh!! I am also a nurse (LPN) and I thought it was humorous. It was all in good fun, I certainly wouldn't take every line seriously. Hugs to my fellow nurse!! :) Greta

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by Linzola1, Nov 20, 2008
I am going to school for the nursing field and I think it is too funny! It is your journal and you are entitled to say what you want! You cracked me up! hahaha

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by 40smama, Nov 21, 2008
Luci - you're so funny!  I read your journal a few days ago and wanted to comment but got distracted (No-No) so didn't get to it.  I thought it was hysterical.  I know you're an excellent nurse just from talking to you and you've helped me out so many times - jen

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