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Well, it's official :)

Jan 13, 2009 - 3 comments

I just flushed the last of my Trams down the toilet.  Yesterday was my last official day of tapering and today I felt better than I have in soooo long!  So I celebrated by dumping the last of them down the toilet.  I know they say "not to flush pills", blah, blah, blah....but I had knew that I wouldn't feel the same if I just placed them in the trash.  No, I wanted to turn the bottle upside down, several feet above the water and let them fall!!!  I love it!!! I feel more joy right now than I have in years.  To see them fall into the water and know that it was the point of no return was the best part.  I feel like I have been cleansed of so much with just that flush.

My symptoms today were much better than they have been yet.  I had a few times of auditory issues and a few dizzy spells, but my fog seemed to be much better.  When I went out and drove today I felt like it was actually okay for me to be driving.  Yesterday I shouldn't have been driving.  I'm amazed at what one day can do.  Up until around 2:00 pm, I felt a bit drug out and after cleaning the kitchen and doing a few other chores, I sat down to rest for a bit.  It is a huge jump from where I was this time last week.  Last week I was counting pills and wondering how I was going to get through until my next bottle.  And then I got really, really MAD and for some reason, had a huge moment of clarity.  

No, the withdrawals haven't been fun and there have been several times when I really thought I should just go and take an other half of a tram to get through some of the withdrawals, but I have to say that finding this site was what saved my life.  Reading other people's stories gave me the courage to do this.  Hearing Finallyfred talk about the miracle that can happen if you just stick it out inspired me.  Thank you, thank you, thank you for this website!

So, as my first tramadol free day closes, I hope that my night tonight will be better than all of the the other before this, but from what I know about tramahell, it can do what it wants for as long as it wants.  Even if I haven't taken any in over 24 hours.  I know it lingers, I can still feel it trying to stick around.  Tonight will be interesting, but tomorrow I will be here talking about it :)

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by cathy5841, Jan 13, 2009
CONGRATS TO is an awesome feeling to take control back.  keep going one miute at a time.  and keep hanging out on the forum, it is great support.  also make sure you check out some aftercare.  it is very important.

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by Amysdone, Jan 13, 2009
Thank you!  Yes, aftercare for sure.  I truly don't think I would have known I could do it without support of some kind.  I find myself needing to be here for support and to try to offer what I can to anyone else going through the hell.  So thank you and everyone else for taking the time to be supportive :)

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by scaredmom330, Jan 13, 2009
Congrats! but we all knew you could do it!!! remember one day at a time, be strong and keep with us...we are here for you!!! Way to go my friend!!!!

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